Just to let you know I haven't died, but am still on holiday! Came in to check email and water the chili plants.
So far it's going OK, but I've spent a good deal of time and money fixing my car. The radiator water bottle burst on the way to pick up my parents, and once I found a replacement, the water pipes started going one by one...
We're now at over R650 for brakes and water problems, and counting!
Have spent quite a bit of time with the parents of course, and done a few things here they wanted to - just come back from a walk way up the mountain, and had lunch today in the nature reserve nearby.
So this is a quick one from me. All the news when I get back next week!
No.Way.
Following up on my Un.Be.Lievable post a week or so back, something else happened today that I just had to come back to work to blog about (even though I've just left here to have a holiday!). Here goes:
My car, as I mentioned, went in to be fixed. This morning I phoned to say I need it by 1, and organized a lift. Got dropped off with my child (so we could go straight from there to the mall for lunch and a shop), only to find my car up on blocks, wheels off, waiting for parts - they'd fixed the wrong Ford by 1!
Well, we were hungry and we had 2 hours to kill, so we decided to walk down the road to a nearby pizza place (our favourite) and have some munchies (near the restaurant I saw recently up for rent). We'd just walked a few metres when I passed a parked truck. Who should greet me but someone I haven't seen for 17 years - the guy who beat up my boyfriend over me! He was waiting to retrieve one of his garden service's lawnmowers, locked in a friend's garage, and said he'd walk with me because he had something huge to tell me.
He handed me a copy of a newspaper article, which I ran my eye over without taking much in, and then launched promptly into how God has worked some huge miracles in the last 3 months. This guy has changed! When I knew him he was on drugs, alcohol and tobacco - at the age of 15 - and was a real a***ole (no other word for it!). Now he can't stop talking about God, and praising Him - in every single sentance. He glows!
And the miracles? Well, he's been in the family garden service business for a few years now, and recently felt led to start a training service, training the unemployed locals to work and produce organic food, create gardenscapes, and then make it a career. He's joined a charismatic church near here where he's been prayed and prophecied over, and found accountability for life-changing decisions. While he was planning this, another group was creating a non-profit company, not knowing what they were supposed to be doing as a company, but getting it going according to God's leading. Then they connected with him, and what he was planning was exactly what they needed to do. Wow. That's what the article was about!
But it doesn't end there. He says just that morning he had coffee with a Christian chef who has been out of work for 5 months, who wants to start working with organic foods in Somerset West. And I was blow away, because I want to start my little food place with organic and natural foods, but am no chef and didn't know where to source the produce locally!
Now it seems we have a chef, a business plan, a source of organic fresh produce, and a way to better the lives of the many, many unemployed around us in the community!!!
Good Lord - is that YOU????
I'm usually pretty sceptic about the prophecies and blessings stuff that charasmatic folk seem to take for granted (grew up in a church suspicious of many aspects of the charismatic movement, and still find a good deal of it pretty scary), and what happened today not only blew my socks off, gave me cold chills and goosebumps, but also scared the hairies out of me! :)
I can only see it as such an amazingly clear sign that God's leading me into this business. I can't wait to share it with the brother that offered financial help!
I had very little time to chat to my old friend, but you can bet we'll be getting together, all 3 of us and God, to do some excited chattering about the possibilities.
I'm still kinda in a state of shock. Please, please will you remember me in prayer? Prayers that I will be sure of the road ahead, that I will get over my terror, and be willing to place my life in God's hands. And prayers of thanks for some mind-blowing stuff that's suddenly started happening.
Thanks!
My car, as I mentioned, went in to be fixed. This morning I phoned to say I need it by 1, and organized a lift. Got dropped off with my child (so we could go straight from there to the mall for lunch and a shop), only to find my car up on blocks, wheels off, waiting for parts - they'd fixed the wrong Ford by 1!
Well, we were hungry and we had 2 hours to kill, so we decided to walk down the road to a nearby pizza place (our favourite) and have some munchies (near the restaurant I saw recently up for rent). We'd just walked a few metres when I passed a parked truck. Who should greet me but someone I haven't seen for 17 years - the guy who beat up my boyfriend over me! He was waiting to retrieve one of his garden service's lawnmowers, locked in a friend's garage, and said he'd walk with me because he had something huge to tell me.
He handed me a copy of a newspaper article, which I ran my eye over without taking much in, and then launched promptly into how God has worked some huge miracles in the last 3 months. This guy has changed! When I knew him he was on drugs, alcohol and tobacco - at the age of 15 - and was a real a***ole (no other word for it!). Now he can't stop talking about God, and praising Him - in every single sentance. He glows!
And the miracles? Well, he's been in the family garden service business for a few years now, and recently felt led to start a training service, training the unemployed locals to work and produce organic food, create gardenscapes, and then make it a career. He's joined a charismatic church near here where he's been prayed and prophecied over, and found accountability for life-changing decisions. While he was planning this, another group was creating a non-profit company, not knowing what they were supposed to be doing as a company, but getting it going according to God's leading. Then they connected with him, and what he was planning was exactly what they needed to do. Wow. That's what the article was about!
But it doesn't end there. He says just that morning he had coffee with a Christian chef who has been out of work for 5 months, who wants to start working with organic foods in Somerset West. And I was blow away, because I want to start my little food place with organic and natural foods, but am no chef and didn't know where to source the produce locally!
Now it seems we have a chef, a business plan, a source of organic fresh produce, and a way to better the lives of the many, many unemployed around us in the community!!!
Good Lord - is that YOU????
I'm usually pretty sceptic about the prophecies and blessings stuff that charasmatic folk seem to take for granted (grew up in a church suspicious of many aspects of the charismatic movement, and still find a good deal of it pretty scary), and what happened today not only blew my socks off, gave me cold chills and goosebumps, but also scared the hairies out of me! :)
I can only see it as such an amazingly clear sign that God's leading me into this business. I can't wait to share it with the brother that offered financial help!
I had very little time to chat to my old friend, but you can bet we'll be getting together, all 3 of us and God, to do some excited chattering about the possibilities.
I'm still kinda in a state of shock. Please, please will you remember me in prayer? Prayers that I will be sure of the road ahead, that I will get over my terror, and be willing to place my life in God's hands. And prayers of thanks for some mind-blowing stuff that's suddenly started happening.
Thanks!
Gone, forgotten....
Hello all! Yes, the holiday is almost upon me, and I will be gone for a while. Though I do have to come in now and then to water my chili and peppadew plants...so I might succumb and blog while here.
I probably won't have much time to read blogs though, which I'm really going to miss.
It's been a bit of a stressful day, although I have basically no work to do. I've been trying to get my car out of the mechanic before 1, and a lift there to fetch it. I was supposed to have my electrics at home inspected today, but now they want to come on Monday (when I'll likely be out and about with my parents, and not home), so I vacuumed this morning for nothing! :) And finally I have to kick 2 international students out of the country before 1. They've more than exceeded their allowed absences, and we're required by the government to ensure they attend classes fulltime. A letter of warning made no difference, so they're out. It's not the first time I've had to do this.
Well, dear readers, that's it for today! Blessings to all and see you later!
I probably won't have much time to read blogs though, which I'm really going to miss.
It's been a bit of a stressful day, although I have basically no work to do. I've been trying to get my car out of the mechanic before 1, and a lift there to fetch it. I was supposed to have my electrics at home inspected today, but now they want to come on Monday (when I'll likely be out and about with my parents, and not home), so I vacuumed this morning for nothing! :) And finally I have to kick 2 international students out of the country before 1. They've more than exceeded their allowed absences, and we're required by the government to ensure they attend classes fulltime. A letter of warning made no difference, so they're out. It's not the first time I've had to do this.
Well, dear readers, that's it for today! Blessings to all and see you later!
Big Questions
I've spent most of the afternoon doing a search for something on the net (religion-related), and am starting to ask (re-ask?) Really Big Questions about denominations and Christianity, and how the two fit together - or don't.
I don't have a single answer yet, but this issue is going to be knocking around in my partially-empty brain for a while, probably knocking a few other issues off the shelves too.
I suspect a few long hard talks with my parents will be involved, and probably some blogging (grit your teeth and bear it...).
I've found that this particular coin not only has two sides, but also a couple of other angles - infinite sides, if you will. I could list the goods and bads and end up with equally long endless lists, constantly added to as each person I come across puts in their bit.
I don't even know if there are answers to some of the half-formed questions in my head. And the end of the working day is hardly the time to try think them through, never mind find answers. These questions are WAY big!!!
But there's a mere half-day of work left before I take a bit of a holiday, and I'm sure I'll have plenty of time to reflect and discuss then.
I don't have a single answer yet, but this issue is going to be knocking around in my partially-empty brain for a while, probably knocking a few other issues off the shelves too.
I suspect a few long hard talks with my parents will be involved, and probably some blogging (grit your teeth and bear it...).
I've found that this particular coin not only has two sides, but also a couple of other angles - infinite sides, if you will. I could list the goods and bads and end up with equally long endless lists, constantly added to as each person I come across puts in their bit.
I don't even know if there are answers to some of the half-formed questions in my head. And the end of the working day is hardly the time to try think them through, never mind find answers. These questions are WAY big!!!
But there's a mere half-day of work left before I take a bit of a holiday, and I'm sure I'll have plenty of time to reflect and discuss then.
Spoiled for Life
Been thinking about money and resources lately, and I realized I've been spoiled for life by what I've learnt in recent years, and what I've grown up knowing.
You see, I find it hard to justify spending a few hundred thousand bucks on a car, when you can get a very decent one for a whole lot less - and then use the cash you would have spent to help someone else. Or taking a round-the-world cruise that costs the earth, instead of supporting a charity or giving to a needy family. Or spending thousands every year on a golf club membership, just because it's the best golf club around.
I was brought up during the war in Rhodesia/Zimbabwe. Things were tight, sanctions came, you made do. You parked your car in the queue for petrol, and walked until petrol arrived. You made your own peanut butter. You had to have "contacts" to buy oil and sugar - and then used them sparingly. That's the culture I grew up in, and what has influenced me forever. I find it hard to pay astronomical amounts for something I can make myself for less (fancy foods, cushion covers, curtains, and home-grown veggies for example). I unconsciously drive in a way that uses less petrol than others do (drifting down hills in neutral instead of pedal to the floor). I turn off lights if I don't need them, and shut down computers at the end of the day. I'm constantly on "use aware" mode. It's not something I can just change.
It really grates me when I see someone dropping litter casually, or leaving a tap dripping water, or not recycling their paper, or wasting anything. Makes me want to deliberately go in front of them and pick up the litter, turn off the tap, recycle the paper - and bless them with a dirty look!:)
I live in the third world. 50% unemployment. Sprawling squatter camps oozing hopelessness. Crime high, moral responsibility low. Many are trapped in a life they can't change, dreaming of just enough to make ends meet. I'm one of the privileged few. I have a job, a house, electricity and running water. My son attends a private school. I drive a car. I can afford food.
This weekend I watched the live lotto draw and wondered what the winner of 10 million bucks would be doing with their cash. Would any of it end up helping someone who so desperately needs it, or would it all be blown on a fancy car, a house, those things the media tells us we are not "real people" without?
What would I do if I won it?
With a potential career change, and consequently needing to find new accommodation when it happens, thoughts of trying to buy a house nearby have once again surfaced. Trouble is, this is a fancy town, a rich town, rapidly growing and expanding - and you'd be lucky to find a house under a million. A MILLION?! Yes - and I'd find it pretty hard to justify spending/going into debt for that amount of cash when just down the road there are kids starving. I don't know how others do it. Do they just not notice? Is it a "me first" thing? Not only do they have a fancy house, but they drive a fancy car - or two.
I tell you, I'm spoiled for life. I can't get out of this frugal, social justice, environmentally aware thought spiral if you paid me - and if you did pay me it might end up being given away anyway.
Is that a good thing?
(BeneDiction has a post on Trade that puts things in perspective with a few statistics)
You see, I find it hard to justify spending a few hundred thousand bucks on a car, when you can get a very decent one for a whole lot less - and then use the cash you would have spent to help someone else. Or taking a round-the-world cruise that costs the earth, instead of supporting a charity or giving to a needy family. Or spending thousands every year on a golf club membership, just because it's the best golf club around.
I was brought up during the war in Rhodesia/Zimbabwe. Things were tight, sanctions came, you made do. You parked your car in the queue for petrol, and walked until petrol arrived. You made your own peanut butter. You had to have "contacts" to buy oil and sugar - and then used them sparingly. That's the culture I grew up in, and what has influenced me forever. I find it hard to pay astronomical amounts for something I can make myself for less (fancy foods, cushion covers, curtains, and home-grown veggies for example). I unconsciously drive in a way that uses less petrol than others do (drifting down hills in neutral instead of pedal to the floor). I turn off lights if I don't need them, and shut down computers at the end of the day. I'm constantly on "use aware" mode. It's not something I can just change.
It really grates me when I see someone dropping litter casually, or leaving a tap dripping water, or not recycling their paper, or wasting anything. Makes me want to deliberately go in front of them and pick up the litter, turn off the tap, recycle the paper - and bless them with a dirty look!:)
I live in the third world. 50% unemployment. Sprawling squatter camps oozing hopelessness. Crime high, moral responsibility low. Many are trapped in a life they can't change, dreaming of just enough to make ends meet. I'm one of the privileged few. I have a job, a house, electricity and running water. My son attends a private school. I drive a car. I can afford food.
This weekend I watched the live lotto draw and wondered what the winner of 10 million bucks would be doing with their cash. Would any of it end up helping someone who so desperately needs it, or would it all be blown on a fancy car, a house, those things the media tells us we are not "real people" without?
What would I do if I won it?
With a potential career change, and consequently needing to find new accommodation when it happens, thoughts of trying to buy a house nearby have once again surfaced. Trouble is, this is a fancy town, a rich town, rapidly growing and expanding - and you'd be lucky to find a house under a million. A MILLION?! Yes - and I'd find it pretty hard to justify spending/going into debt for that amount of cash when just down the road there are kids starving. I don't know how others do it. Do they just not notice? Is it a "me first" thing? Not only do they have a fancy house, but they drive a fancy car - or two.
I tell you, I'm spoiled for life. I can't get out of this frugal, social justice, environmentally aware thought spiral if you paid me - and if you did pay me it might end up being given away anyway.
Is that a good thing?
(BeneDiction has a post on Trade that puts things in perspective with a few statistics)
What Freaky Mother Are You?
Laura directed me to this one, and it's so spot-on it's scary...
You're an earth mother! Your friends sometimes
call you Gaea, because you're the original
earth goddess! You and your kids both have
dirt under your fingernails, and you spend as
much of your time as possible out of doors.
Your kids have an incredible appreciation for
nature.
What kind of a freaky mother are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
You're an earth mother! Your friends sometimes
call you Gaea, because you're the original
earth goddess! You and your kids both have
dirt under your fingernails, and you spend as
much of your time as possible out of doors.
Your kids have an incredible appreciation for
nature.
What kind of a freaky mother are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Gmail Accounts
I got a couple of gmail accounts to give away (don't you just love Google's way of marketing!:) ). Interested? Email me - michelle dot bainbridge at gmail dot com - or leave a message in the comments with your email address. I'll happily pass them on - or hoard them, if no-one wants them. I may just be one of the very last to pick up an account, and everyone else probably already has one.
Gmail has been a bit of a blessing so far. My brother had trouble getting a perfectly harmless email past our spam/virus filter to me, but managed to send it to gmail. The one spam mail I received at gmail was marked as such by using a nifty "report spam" button. Replies are easy, and of course there's that massive storage thing.
So shout if you want one.
Gmail has been a bit of a blessing so far. My brother had trouble getting a perfectly harmless email past our spam/virus filter to me, but managed to send it to gmail. The one spam mail I received at gmail was marked as such by using a nifty "report spam" button. Replies are easy, and of course there's that massive storage thing.
So shout if you want one.
Good Day
Ever had one of those days that just feel good? Well today's it for me.
It's a stunning Spring day, warm and non-windy (a plus in my books!), everything bursting forth in blooms - the lawns, the fruit trees, the hedges. I got to eat my breakfast in the sun this morning at 7:30, surrounded by the assorted birds that stop by for Mixed Poultry Grain, the tentative rat after bread crusts, 2 beggish dogs and the fieldmouse - and the view! Wow, what a view.
I finished my assignment and uploaded it. A week ahead of schedule. (I just hope all the graphics etc work... but am awaiting confirmation from the course guys.) I've gone for non-serious, and fun, and hope that it's acceptable in a serious course like web design.
My package arrived - unfortunately not the Generous Orthodoxy book, but rather 2 very very cheap videos I ordered. Monsters Inc for the boy, and Return of the King for me! Yeah... :) I've kept the poor kid guessing for a week as to what could be in "something arriving in the post", giving him all sorts of arb clues. Hope he likes what it's turned out to be.
I have only a day and a half after this left before I'm on holiday, and the first day of holiday I get to mosey around the Country Craft Market and (hopefully) stock up on a few more bath books (Reader's Digest Condensed Books). May indulge in a little candyfloss or koeksusters while there (don't know what the latter is? Shame, poor you, you've had such a deprived upbringing!).
I don't have that much work to do, so can stare out the window a bit at the lovely day, and wiggle my toes in the sunshine coming in under the desk.
My car is being sorted out so I won't have to drive and worry - there goes my intense prayer life! :)
I've got my favourite summer shoes on - slip-ons that are beautifully decorated with beads.
And my pants somehow don't feel as tight today as they were yesterday. There's something to be said for being stressful and rushing.
Hey, a good day to you too!
It's a stunning Spring day, warm and non-windy (a plus in my books!), everything bursting forth in blooms - the lawns, the fruit trees, the hedges. I got to eat my breakfast in the sun this morning at 7:30, surrounded by the assorted birds that stop by for Mixed Poultry Grain, the tentative rat after bread crusts, 2 beggish dogs and the fieldmouse - and the view! Wow, what a view.
I finished my assignment and uploaded it. A week ahead of schedule. (I just hope all the graphics etc work... but am awaiting confirmation from the course guys.) I've gone for non-serious, and fun, and hope that it's acceptable in a serious course like web design.
My package arrived - unfortunately not the Generous Orthodoxy book, but rather 2 very very cheap videos I ordered. Monsters Inc for the boy, and Return of the King for me! Yeah... :) I've kept the poor kid guessing for a week as to what could be in "something arriving in the post", giving him all sorts of arb clues. Hope he likes what it's turned out to be.
I have only a day and a half after this left before I'm on holiday, and the first day of holiday I get to mosey around the Country Craft Market and (hopefully) stock up on a few more bath books (Reader's Digest Condensed Books). May indulge in a little candyfloss or koeksusters while there (don't know what the latter is? Shame, poor you, you've had such a deprived upbringing!).
I don't have that much work to do, so can stare out the window a bit at the lovely day, and wiggle my toes in the sunshine coming in under the desk.
My car is being sorted out so I won't have to drive and worry - there goes my intense prayer life! :)
I've got my favourite summer shoes on - slip-ons that are beautifully decorated with beads.
And my pants somehow don't feel as tight today as they were yesterday. There's something to be said for being stressful and rushing.
Hey, a good day to you too!
The advantages of NOT going to church
Wanted to link to these two things last week - ran out of time. About to run out of more time, so here goes:
Madhousewife goes to church, and wishes she hadn't.
Robbymac doesn't go to church - and finds out that it has its benefits.
Both food for thought - and now I must dash off and "feed a hungry child in Africa" (who is probably so busy with the playstation he hasn't realized I'm coming home a bit late).
Madhousewife goes to church, and wishes she hadn't.
Robbymac doesn't go to church - and finds out that it has its benefits.
Both food for thought - and now I must dash off and "feed a hungry child in Africa" (who is probably so busy with the playstation he hasn't realized I'm coming home a bit late).
Success!!!!
I spent a heck of a lot of time this weekend filling my two cake orders (most of the time was spent with the car breaking down and having to be push-started, and the brake/clutch fluid running dry for the second time in 2 weeks, so having to tentatively head down the hill to a garage to replace it). The folk who ordered them have just come to tell me they LOVED them! That everyone was asking who made them, and they'll be repeat-customers. And send everyone else my way....
WOW! And here I was worried that the icing on the second cake was way too neon-pink, and that the first one wasn't decorated enough.
I've just dropped my car off to sort out it's issues before my parents make their way out here, and on the way I passed a restaurant that's been "to rent" for almost a year now. Standing empty, but with a kitchen and tables, right on the corner of two very busy streets, and surrounded by a shop, pizza place, Portuguese restaurant and Chinese take-away! OK.... that could be the most ideal place I've yet seen for that business I'm planning....
(Just asked for a price, and although it seems steep to me on my meagre salary, it's way below what hiring an old busines-zoned house and renovating it would cost)
Think these could be God not only giving me a "sign" but a whole pile of them? If so, Lord, I'm in! I think... It's still a bit scary, but if this is right I'll just have to take the leap and trust.
WOW! And here I was worried that the icing on the second cake was way too neon-pink, and that the first one wasn't decorated enough.
I've just dropped my car off to sort out it's issues before my parents make their way out here, and on the way I passed a restaurant that's been "to rent" for almost a year now. Standing empty, but with a kitchen and tables, right on the corner of two very busy streets, and surrounded by a shop, pizza place, Portuguese restaurant and Chinese take-away! OK.... that could be the most ideal place I've yet seen for that business I'm planning....
(Just asked for a price, and although it seems steep to me on my meagre salary, it's way below what hiring an old busines-zoned house and renovating it would cost)
Think these could be God not only giving me a "sign" but a whole pile of them? If so, Lord, I'm in! I think... It's still a bit scary, but if this is right I'll just have to take the leap and trust.
Being Big
At a loss late Sabbath afternoon as to what to do while the rain poured down outside, I hauled out my newest Hillsong video and watched it. Yes, I succumbed and gave financial support to a mega-church! :)
I have to admit that there's something to be said for mega-church worship. The crowd vibe is so cool. The number of people attending means it's worth dolling up the venue and using the best soundsystem. You can do cool effects with lights and smoke, and have an entire stage full of musical wonders. Not to mention a 500+ voice choir as "backing singers".
It's better to be jumping up and down in a block of other people than doing it alone in your lounge. The neighbours might complain if you turn up the volume on your TV set - but at the big event it's SUPPOSED to be that loud! Feeling the Spirit move on your own is hard work - much easier when thousands around you are.
And of course, being Mega means you have so much more talent, so many more resources to draw on when you want to craft worship. Heck, you can take over the worship world, flood it with the way you do things and everyone might just start following your lead!
Yeah, there's much to be said about mega-church gatherings. And now and then it's cool to worship in a huge, anonymous crowd.
But it can also make it harder to worship alone. You don't have the hype or the atmosphere to get you started, you can't be drawn along on a wave of emotion, or have the Spirit prayed down on you. It's just you and God - and the silence can get very loud.
I love watching my Hillsong videos (all 2 of them) - I love seeing how they do it, how they lead respond, and singing along to songs that are (probably too) easy to learn. I love the effects and the huge choir and seeing the youth go nuts in the front rows. I still want to be in their crowd one day, just for the experience of it.
But it's a bit soul-numbing. If you do it in a crowd too long you lose the ability to do it on your own. And that's where I'm at right now. Trying to learn to be a one-(wo)man praise band for God, trying to worship Him with my solitary voice, and to find out just what that sounds like. It's not lost in the music, it stands out pathetically small and off-key. I need to learn to hear it like God does, and to find acceptable worship, just between me and Him.
I have to admit that there's something to be said for mega-church worship. The crowd vibe is so cool. The number of people attending means it's worth dolling up the venue and using the best soundsystem. You can do cool effects with lights and smoke, and have an entire stage full of musical wonders. Not to mention a 500+ voice choir as "backing singers".
It's better to be jumping up and down in a block of other people than doing it alone in your lounge. The neighbours might complain if you turn up the volume on your TV set - but at the big event it's SUPPOSED to be that loud! Feeling the Spirit move on your own is hard work - much easier when thousands around you are.
And of course, being Mega means you have so much more talent, so many more resources to draw on when you want to craft worship. Heck, you can take over the worship world, flood it with the way you do things and everyone might just start following your lead!
Yeah, there's much to be said about mega-church gatherings. And now and then it's cool to worship in a huge, anonymous crowd.
But it can also make it harder to worship alone. You don't have the hype or the atmosphere to get you started, you can't be drawn along on a wave of emotion, or have the Spirit prayed down on you. It's just you and God - and the silence can get very loud.
I love watching my Hillsong videos (all 2 of them) - I love seeing how they do it, how they lead respond, and singing along to songs that are (probably too) easy to learn. I love the effects and the huge choir and seeing the youth go nuts in the front rows. I still want to be in their crowd one day, just for the experience of it.
But it's a bit soul-numbing. If you do it in a crowd too long you lose the ability to do it on your own. And that's where I'm at right now. Trying to learn to be a one-(wo)man praise band for God, trying to worship Him with my solitary voice, and to find out just what that sounds like. It's not lost in the music, it stands out pathetically small and off-key. I need to learn to hear it like God does, and to find acceptable worship, just between me and Him.
The Gateway
I have four huge files of stuff I've printed out to read during my Sabbath quiet time - most of it mind-stretching articles from various online publications (think The Ooze, Next-Wave, Sojourners and others).
After reading everything I'd printed for this week, I decided to go back to my first file and see what I was reading a year ago. Right at the very bottom of the file, I came across a planning document for a church-plant I almost spoke to the pastor about. It was to be called The Gateway.
You see, I was all on fire about possibilities and change and good stuff, and thought that if we couldn't do it in the current congregation (a bunch of stiff-necked old fogies, generally speaking), perhaps we could go do it as a new group!
I wrote and re-wrote the concept document, I tested waters, I talked with the church president for the area, I sent out a survey to a number of people across various church groups - and that's when it all came crashing down. You see, I made the mistake of asking the current doing-practical-experience Theology student to fill one in, and not to tell the pastor (because it was background info I wanted to collect before I spoke to him, so I had a leg to stand on). Not only did he NOT fill in the survey, but the next day I got a "what the hell do you think you're doing" phonecall from the pastor, not asking why I was doing a survey, but forbidding me from doing anything, ANYTHING, in the church without first asking his permission. He didn't ask if the survey had been only done in his church or others, he didn't ask what it was for, he didn't say anything other that "it contains some disturbing/hard questions", and that I should back off.
From that day on I was blacklisted by both him and the head elder. She's still not talking to me. And it wasn't too long before I walked out and went to worship elsewhere.
The big plan was filed away forever, lost because one person jumped to conclusions and beat another down.
So there it was, staring me in the face as I paged through my file. Gee, it's been a while, I thought. I wonder how relevant this stuff is now, after my major learning curve. After all I've learnt about emerging church and cultural shifts, after having stepped away from doing church and into being it.
So I open the first page.
"Adventist SOW Centre (Service, Outreach, Worship)" it says. So far so good. On to purpose:
"To provide a Seventh-day Adventist community worship group that will:
• Reach the back-slidden and children of SDA families that no longer attend church
• Reach the un-reached in the Helderberg Basin
• Provide a contemporary, exciting, refreshing and genuine worship experience grounded in Biblical community church and worship principles
• Provide a haven of acceptance for the criticized, the different, the unloved, the ostracized
• Provide a visible and accessible Adventist presence in the heart of the community
• Provide community service 7 days a week in various ministry areas – feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, healing the hurting
• Show the way for a new Adventist experience in South Africa – a new way of evangelising, worshipping, caring for the community and catering for member needs"
Funny how I would now be considered one of those backslidden, non-church-attending kids. But otherwise not a bad purpose I guess, if you're trying to build a church. And I still think we need to get off the hill, out from behind the security gates and down to "where the people are".
So on I journey through the document...
Up to about a year ago I had never heard of Emerging Church, or found alt.worship. Strange that so many of the things I've written tie in so closely with both of these! Especially the pre worked-for-a-pitch version, when it was going to be an independent thing, not under a congregational banner - before I talked to the church president who said they didn't do it that way, and had to change it.
I was quite surprised that much of what I now believe a church should do and be is in that document. I thought everything had changed, but there are some pretty firm basics that I seem to keep coming back to. If I had to build a church group, a Seventh-day Adventist church group, one that revolves around a building and events and a lifestyle and a couple of leaders, this one would still pretty much cover it. Granted, there might be a few changes now that I've been learning stuff, but it's still not a bad plan. If I had to make one.
So am I just circling back to the beginning in my journey? I don't think so. What I DO think is that there are a few ground rules that will always be foundational to my beliefs and perceptions, but other things will change as I grow. I may gain a new perspective on a ground rule, or I may find another, better way to implement it. It is, after all, a growing season, this journey that I'm on.
In a way I'm glad there are things that I still believe, and that I haven't lost my footing completely as I drift along this path. It kinda gives me hope for the road ahead.
(Before you ask, if you interested in seeing The Gateway concept document, it's here, plainly converted to web format from Word, font variations and all.)
After reading everything I'd printed for this week, I decided to go back to my first file and see what I was reading a year ago. Right at the very bottom of the file, I came across a planning document for a church-plant I almost spoke to the pastor about. It was to be called The Gateway.
You see, I was all on fire about possibilities and change and good stuff, and thought that if we couldn't do it in the current congregation (a bunch of stiff-necked old fogies, generally speaking), perhaps we could go do it as a new group!
I wrote and re-wrote the concept document, I tested waters, I talked with the church president for the area, I sent out a survey to a number of people across various church groups - and that's when it all came crashing down. You see, I made the mistake of asking the current doing-practical-experience Theology student to fill one in, and not to tell the pastor (because it was background info I wanted to collect before I spoke to him, so I had a leg to stand on). Not only did he NOT fill in the survey, but the next day I got a "what the hell do you think you're doing" phonecall from the pastor, not asking why I was doing a survey, but forbidding me from doing anything, ANYTHING, in the church without first asking his permission. He didn't ask if the survey had been only done in his church or others, he didn't ask what it was for, he didn't say anything other that "it contains some disturbing/hard questions", and that I should back off.
From that day on I was blacklisted by both him and the head elder. She's still not talking to me. And it wasn't too long before I walked out and went to worship elsewhere.
The big plan was filed away forever, lost because one person jumped to conclusions and beat another down.
So there it was, staring me in the face as I paged through my file. Gee, it's been a while, I thought. I wonder how relevant this stuff is now, after my major learning curve. After all I've learnt about emerging church and cultural shifts, after having stepped away from doing church and into being it.
So I open the first page.
"Adventist SOW Centre (Service, Outreach, Worship)" it says. So far so good. On to purpose:
"To provide a Seventh-day Adventist community worship group that will:
• Reach the back-slidden and children of SDA families that no longer attend church
• Reach the un-reached in the Helderberg Basin
• Provide a contemporary, exciting, refreshing and genuine worship experience grounded in Biblical community church and worship principles
• Provide a haven of acceptance for the criticized, the different, the unloved, the ostracized
• Provide a visible and accessible Adventist presence in the heart of the community
• Provide community service 7 days a week in various ministry areas – feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, healing the hurting
• Show the way for a new Adventist experience in South Africa – a new way of evangelising, worshipping, caring for the community and catering for member needs"
Funny how I would now be considered one of those backslidden, non-church-attending kids. But otherwise not a bad purpose I guess, if you're trying to build a church. And I still think we need to get off the hill, out from behind the security gates and down to "where the people are".
So on I journey through the document...
Up to about a year ago I had never heard of Emerging Church, or found alt.worship. Strange that so many of the things I've written tie in so closely with both of these! Especially the pre worked-for-a-pitch version, when it was going to be an independent thing, not under a congregational banner - before I talked to the church president who said they didn't do it that way, and had to change it.
I was quite surprised that much of what I now believe a church should do and be is in that document. I thought everything had changed, but there are some pretty firm basics that I seem to keep coming back to. If I had to build a church group, a Seventh-day Adventist church group, one that revolves around a building and events and a lifestyle and a couple of leaders, this one would still pretty much cover it. Granted, there might be a few changes now that I've been learning stuff, but it's still not a bad plan. If I had to make one.
So am I just circling back to the beginning in my journey? I don't think so. What I DO think is that there are a few ground rules that will always be foundational to my beliefs and perceptions, but other things will change as I grow. I may gain a new perspective on a ground rule, or I may find another, better way to implement it. It is, after all, a growing season, this journey that I'm on.
In a way I'm glad there are things that I still believe, and that I haven't lost my footing completely as I drift along this path. It kinda gives me hope for the road ahead.
(Before you ask, if you interested in seeing The Gateway concept document, it's here, plainly converted to web format from Word, font variations and all.)
They're Here...!
My parents arrived late last night for their every-few-years visit. But it being late, and the road between here and the airport apparently prone to danger of attack/hijacking/whatever, we were advised not to meet them at the airport. We'll only see them on Saturday, when my dad officiates at baby Ethan's dedication, with the entire family in church for a change!
But they're here. It's going to be good to catch up with them, to have them around for a few weeks. And yet...
Us kids are a bit worried. It's weird, it's irrational, but we're worried. You see, they left South Africa in 1997, and we've all done a good deal of growing up since then. Both brothers are married, one has produced a child, and their other grandson is almost as tall as they are. In the past 8 years we've changed a lot, but the parents may not realize it - they may expect us to still be the same kids we were 8 years ago, ages 25, 23 and 21... We're not. They haven't been here to see the decisions we've made, the roads we've travelled, and how we've gotten to where we are now. And we're kinda worried they will still expect us to be the same kids they left here years ago.
If that isn't enough, I've got the additional worry of having to please-explain where I've ended up in relation to the church, the one I was brought up in, the one my dad pastors in, the one I work for and the one I no longer attend... I expect some folk will take this opportunity to tell my parents how bad I've been - that I've completely back-slidden and they'd better sort me out while they're here. And I may have to do some sit-down-and-talk with the parents to try explain this journey I'm on.
Oh, and did I mention that my mother has insisted on meeting up with my son's "other gran" for coffee? Who knows what they'll say about me, my son and the past...things I'd rather have left there, and not dragged out again. We don't have any real contact with her, and for now that's best. But I suspect that after The Meeting, my mother will insist I include her in our lives.
All of these worries may, of course, be totally ungrounded. Everything could be quite peachy and we may be anxious over nothing. My parents have been completely supportive of me so far (by email - may be different in person) while I travel this spiritual road. They could have realized how different we've all become. They may let me make my own decisions regarding the "other" relatives and not push me. You never know.
We've got a lot of plans for their time here. I'll be off the blog and on leave for a week and a half come Thursday 1pm. We're going to do all we can cram into that time, all that my parents have been longing to do in the area and with my son. (Consequently my car goes in today for a check on problems with brakes and starters) It's not going to be the most relaxing holiday.
We're going to do our darndest to enjoy it though, even if it kills us! :)
But they're here. It's going to be good to catch up with them, to have them around for a few weeks. And yet...
Us kids are a bit worried. It's weird, it's irrational, but we're worried. You see, they left South Africa in 1997, and we've all done a good deal of growing up since then. Both brothers are married, one has produced a child, and their other grandson is almost as tall as they are. In the past 8 years we've changed a lot, but the parents may not realize it - they may expect us to still be the same kids we were 8 years ago, ages 25, 23 and 21... We're not. They haven't been here to see the decisions we've made, the roads we've travelled, and how we've gotten to where we are now. And we're kinda worried they will still expect us to be the same kids they left here years ago.
If that isn't enough, I've got the additional worry of having to please-explain where I've ended up in relation to the church, the one I was brought up in, the one my dad pastors in, the one I work for and the one I no longer attend... I expect some folk will take this opportunity to tell my parents how bad I've been - that I've completely back-slidden and they'd better sort me out while they're here. And I may have to do some sit-down-and-talk with the parents to try explain this journey I'm on.
Oh, and did I mention that my mother has insisted on meeting up with my son's "other gran" for coffee? Who knows what they'll say about me, my son and the past...things I'd rather have left there, and not dragged out again. We don't have any real contact with her, and for now that's best. But I suspect that after The Meeting, my mother will insist I include her in our lives.
All of these worries may, of course, be totally ungrounded. Everything could be quite peachy and we may be anxious over nothing. My parents have been completely supportive of me so far (by email - may be different in person) while I travel this spiritual road. They could have realized how different we've all become. They may let me make my own decisions regarding the "other" relatives and not push me. You never know.
We've got a lot of plans for their time here. I'll be off the blog and on leave for a week and a half come Thursday 1pm. We're going to do all we can cram into that time, all that my parents have been longing to do in the area and with my son. (Consequently my car goes in today for a check on problems with brakes and starters) It's not going to be the most relaxing holiday.
We're going to do our darndest to enjoy it though, even if it kills us! :)
Shabbat Shalom
Deep peace of the running wave to you
Deep peace of the flowing air to you
Deep peace of the quiet earth to you
Deep peace of the shining stars to you
Deep peace of the infinite peace to you
Deep peace of the flowing air to you
Deep peace of the quiet earth to you
Deep peace of the shining stars to you
Deep peace of the infinite peace to you
The Bridge from Here to There
A day or so back I went off on a feeling-blue thing here, and one of the issues was that I can see the business I want to start on the other side of the chasm, but can't seem to get there.
THIS time I remembered to pray about it. Actually I asked God for a big sign to show this is where I should be headed, instead of planning to stick around with my current job (9 years and counting....).
You know, I think He's given that sign. My two cake orders came without me doing any advertising. They came looking for me, as every full-time job I've ever held has done. They're giving me a chance to test my wings in doing things I haven't quite tried yet (like a pretty cool, quite beautiful 21st cake for Sunday night, done cheaply). They've made me stop and think what my services are worth - I always tend to undercharge, and I realize now that's connected to my own sense of self-worth, that I don't think I'm worth more than that. It's also a stepping stone to doing more. If this girl likes what I produce, she's likely to come back with other orders for other things. And before you know it, I will have tested out all the foods I plan to offer in my little business!
Perhaps I'm jumping the gun - I tend to see the end before I've started the race. But this could be the first brick in that bridge to what I dream of doing. This could just be that Sign I've asked for.
THIS time I remembered to pray about it. Actually I asked God for a big sign to show this is where I should be headed, instead of planning to stick around with my current job (9 years and counting....).
You know, I think He's given that sign. My two cake orders came without me doing any advertising. They came looking for me, as every full-time job I've ever held has done. They're giving me a chance to test my wings in doing things I haven't quite tried yet (like a pretty cool, quite beautiful 21st cake for Sunday night, done cheaply). They've made me stop and think what my services are worth - I always tend to undercharge, and I realize now that's connected to my own sense of self-worth, that I don't think I'm worth more than that. It's also a stepping stone to doing more. If this girl likes what I produce, she's likely to come back with other orders for other things. And before you know it, I will have tested out all the foods I plan to offer in my little business!
Perhaps I'm jumping the gun - I tend to see the end before I've started the race. But this could be the first brick in that bridge to what I dream of doing. This could just be that Sign I've asked for.
For a Season
I've got a friend, a very good friend, who I love and admire. She's the most incredible Christian woman, a stunning red-head whose inner beauty is even more impressive than her outer looks. I met her 2 1/2 years ago, when I stepped out of one church and went looking for something new and real. She and I had an almost instant connection - we're both pianists, both love music, find many points of connection in our lives. We used to talk every single day, often for an hour or so. We'd go out for coffee and not even notice the hours flying by.
But when I left the worship team, suddenly there weren't that many points of connection. After a month of not hearing from her, I called her up. Another month and a half, and I called her again. Things have changed from our daily chats...
There's an often-emailed saying about friends for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Within the past 2 years she has been a lifeline of inspiration and advice, keeping me on track with worship and church.
Recently things have changed. Seasons have changed, and that much-needed connection is not really that necessary anymore. Although we're still good friends, we're not in each other's lives each day.
My spiritual journey has led me away from the usual "church" and out into the desert of something new and different. I'm not the happy Christian that the rest of the congregation seems to be, and I'm not strong. I'm weak and seeking, questioning and thinking in directions far removed from everyone else. My friend can't relate to that very well I think. She sees me still as one of the crowd of sames, all happy and church-going and spiritually strong - and when I turn up different to that image, it makes it hard for her to be present in my life.
I still love her dearly, but I think God brought her into my life for a season, not a lifetime. For a reason, not forever. Not as a bosom-buddy that is. Just as someone I know well, who I connect with now and then.
Sometimes it's hard to see a good friend in these terms, to be able to let go easily and gracefully, without souring things by hanging on to the death. But in recognizing the journey, that I have not reached a destination, but am only touching signposts on the way, I've found it easier to do than it might have been.
I miss hearing from her every day, and I haven't yet connected deeply with anyone else, but I'm thankful for the season in which she made such a big difference in my life.
But when I left the worship team, suddenly there weren't that many points of connection. After a month of not hearing from her, I called her up. Another month and a half, and I called her again. Things have changed from our daily chats...
There's an often-emailed saying about friends for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Within the past 2 years she has been a lifeline of inspiration and advice, keeping me on track with worship and church.
Recently things have changed. Seasons have changed, and that much-needed connection is not really that necessary anymore. Although we're still good friends, we're not in each other's lives each day.
My spiritual journey has led me away from the usual "church" and out into the desert of something new and different. I'm not the happy Christian that the rest of the congregation seems to be, and I'm not strong. I'm weak and seeking, questioning and thinking in directions far removed from everyone else. My friend can't relate to that very well I think. She sees me still as one of the crowd of sames, all happy and church-going and spiritually strong - and when I turn up different to that image, it makes it hard for her to be present in my life.
I still love her dearly, but I think God brought her into my life for a season, not a lifetime. For a reason, not forever. Not as a bosom-buddy that is. Just as someone I know well, who I connect with now and then.
Sometimes it's hard to see a good friend in these terms, to be able to let go easily and gracefully, without souring things by hanging on to the death. But in recognizing the journey, that I have not reached a destination, but am only touching signposts on the way, I've found it easier to do than it might have been.
I miss hearing from her every day, and I haven't yet connected deeply with anyone else, but I'm thankful for the season in which she made such a big difference in my life.
Speed-Blog
Things are going MAD at work today! Not only do I have some huge stuff to finish off, but have also been given a few big, urgent things to do - today. So not much time to blog here.
The good thing about a busy day is that the hours fly past. Before you know it, the working day's over.
Tonight I get to do something a bit different. I have a cake to make for an 8-year-old's birthday, by order, which will bring in a few bucks on Friday. The same orderer has just said she wants another, fancier one for her sister's 21st on Sunday - but I don't do fancy, only fun. She's checking in later this afternoon to see if I'll manage it, as we'll also be out all Sunday. I've got until then to decide yes or no! Trouble is, she's not willing to pay the extra it would take to make a normal cake into a fancy one. And I'm not sure I want to make the effort for what she's willing to pay.
Well, time to rush off again. Too much to do, too much to do...
The good thing about a busy day is that the hours fly past. Before you know it, the working day's over.
Tonight I get to do something a bit different. I have a cake to make for an 8-year-old's birthday, by order, which will bring in a few bucks on Friday. The same orderer has just said she wants another, fancier one for her sister's 21st on Sunday - but I don't do fancy, only fun. She's checking in later this afternoon to see if I'll manage it, as we'll also be out all Sunday. I've got until then to decide yes or no! Trouble is, she's not willing to pay the extra it would take to make a normal cake into a fancy one. And I'm not sure I want to make the effort for what she's willing to pay.
Well, time to rush off again. Too much to do, too much to do...
Un-Balance
I feel like my life is so out of balance at the moment.
Last night my son was overtired, and needing a lot of hugs, his eyes tearing up from exhuastion and wanting his mom. A part of me wanted to gather him up and fill his empty hear-spaces - but that dark part of me, the part that doesn't feel a thing and can't remember how to love, pulled back from contact, from embrace, didn't want to be touched. It was a really big struggle to give him the love he needed, and I'm still not sure I gave all I could. Though everything looked better in the early-morning light.
Sitting at work I plan time with him at the end of the day, long talks and walks. I plan family traditions and those good rituals that make forever-memories. I plan a better life, better nutrition, more connection, better parenting.
But when I get home he's on the playstation and supper needs making. The dogs want walking, but he doesn't. We eat in front of the one-eyed-monster, he does his homework, he bathes, and then he's in bed. And we've missed out on all those things I sit at work and plan.
When I dress in the morning my clothes feel tight - I know I'm not getting the exercise or decent food I should be, and I say "today will be different". And then it isn't.
I dream about the business I want to start. I can see the end result, I can imagine living the life. But there's no bridge from here to there. No time to figure it out, no way to blend slowly from this existance to that. I know I should be starting small from home, building a client base and an income. But this life doesn't have the hours in the day to make it happen - the energy required to work, parent and work some more. I feel stuck, trapped on a cliff with a bright future on the other side of an enormous chasm.
Today, I say, I'll finish my studies, I'll get that website filled up with info, I'll think through the yearbook and plan the layout. But the day is gone before I can do it - and I've spent it treading water or running other's errands.
I've got to spend time with God - but I fall asleep after a two-sentance prayer and can't seem to get down on my knees.
I put in the Tae-Bo tape, but my feet won't do the starting shuffle, never mind the kicks. My arms are going the wrong way, I should probably first do the instructional tape - but that's an hour long and all I have is time for the 8-minute workout. So I stop the tape after 2 minutes and wonder how I'm going to get rid of my thunder-thighs. I even consider buying those miracle weight-loss pills - if only I had enough cash. If only I hadn't spent so much buying books online this month.
I know my car needs the brakes and clutch checked - why are they using so much fluid? But come tonight, and I'll have forgotten once again to get hold of the mechanic. Don't have the cash anyway. And I should have called up the guy who has to clean the lounge suite - my parents arrive this weekend!
Is there any way I can get back on track? How do I stop this, the things that grate on my soul? Why can't I just pull myself up by my bootstraps and do this living thing well, fitting in the good stuff effortlessly, being the person I want to, the parent (the only parent) my son so desperately needs? Where are the paths to my dreams - have they become overgrown with choking weeds? Why can't I find balance?
"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate, I do." Rom 7:15
Last night my son was overtired, and needing a lot of hugs, his eyes tearing up from exhuastion and wanting his mom. A part of me wanted to gather him up and fill his empty hear-spaces - but that dark part of me, the part that doesn't feel a thing and can't remember how to love, pulled back from contact, from embrace, didn't want to be touched. It was a really big struggle to give him the love he needed, and I'm still not sure I gave all I could. Though everything looked better in the early-morning light.
Sitting at work I plan time with him at the end of the day, long talks and walks. I plan family traditions and those good rituals that make forever-memories. I plan a better life, better nutrition, more connection, better parenting.
But when I get home he's on the playstation and supper needs making. The dogs want walking, but he doesn't. We eat in front of the one-eyed-monster, he does his homework, he bathes, and then he's in bed. And we've missed out on all those things I sit at work and plan.
When I dress in the morning my clothes feel tight - I know I'm not getting the exercise or decent food I should be, and I say "today will be different". And then it isn't.
I dream about the business I want to start. I can see the end result, I can imagine living the life. But there's no bridge from here to there. No time to figure it out, no way to blend slowly from this existance to that. I know I should be starting small from home, building a client base and an income. But this life doesn't have the hours in the day to make it happen - the energy required to work, parent and work some more. I feel stuck, trapped on a cliff with a bright future on the other side of an enormous chasm.
Today, I say, I'll finish my studies, I'll get that website filled up with info, I'll think through the yearbook and plan the layout. But the day is gone before I can do it - and I've spent it treading water or running other's errands.
I've got to spend time with God - but I fall asleep after a two-sentance prayer and can't seem to get down on my knees.
I put in the Tae-Bo tape, but my feet won't do the starting shuffle, never mind the kicks. My arms are going the wrong way, I should probably first do the instructional tape - but that's an hour long and all I have is time for the 8-minute workout. So I stop the tape after 2 minutes and wonder how I'm going to get rid of my thunder-thighs. I even consider buying those miracle weight-loss pills - if only I had enough cash. If only I hadn't spent so much buying books online this month.
I know my car needs the brakes and clutch checked - why are they using so much fluid? But come tonight, and I'll have forgotten once again to get hold of the mechanic. Don't have the cash anyway. And I should have called up the guy who has to clean the lounge suite - my parents arrive this weekend!
Is there any way I can get back on track? How do I stop this, the things that grate on my soul? Why can't I just pull myself up by my bootstraps and do this living thing well, fitting in the good stuff effortlessly, being the person I want to, the parent (the only parent) my son so desperately needs? Where are the paths to my dreams - have they become overgrown with choking weeds? Why can't I find balance?
"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate, I do." Rom 7:15
Peace & Quiet
Not much blogging going on here today (after yesterday's posting frenzy). I'm trying to get my brain around Javascript and CSS, in time to develop a good-looking website for my assignment deadline next week!
But my studies are paying off - my work's site just got a brand-new feature, a photo album of Sunday night's banquet (thanks to an automatic feature in Dreamweaver). I fiddle with something on the site every day, and it's slowly starting to look good / work well. Am also busy with the new site - the structure's set up, now I have to fill it with stuff.
So that's what I'm up to today. Once it's over, I'll blog again.
But my studies are paying off - my work's site just got a brand-new feature, a photo album of Sunday night's banquet (thanks to an automatic feature in Dreamweaver). I fiddle with something on the site every day, and it's slowly starting to look good / work well. Am also busy with the new site - the structure's set up, now I have to fill it with stuff.
So that's what I'm up to today. Once it's over, I'll blog again.
Summertime
You can tell it's summer (or you think it is) when you make your first batch of home-made ginger beer of the season!
I've got just such a batch percolating in the (currently defrosting) fridge. The raisins are bobbing, the mix is bubbling - oh boy, oh boy, summer's almost here!
Of course ginger beer gets better and better the longer it's left - to a point that is. I wouldn't want to be fired for turning up at work after lunch extra-happy, thanks to a three-week old batch! But a week or so is perfect.
We had our first sips at lunchtime today. OH YEAH, that stuff was good.
Next on our summertime food/drinks list? Nigella's chocolate-chunk pavlova with fresh field-warm strawberries of course! Bring it on!!!
I've got just such a batch percolating in the (currently defrosting) fridge. The raisins are bobbing, the mix is bubbling - oh boy, oh boy, summer's almost here!
Of course ginger beer gets better and better the longer it's left - to a point that is. I wouldn't want to be fired for turning up at work after lunch extra-happy, thanks to a three-week old batch! But a week or so is perfect.
We had our first sips at lunchtime today. OH YEAH, that stuff was good.
Next on our summertime food/drinks list? Nigella's chocolate-chunk pavlova with fresh field-warm strawberries of course! Bring it on!!!
For Better - or Worse....
Do you know whether you're single or married? Well, many South Africans don't!
There's a huge marriage scam that's been uncovered in South Africa. A number of foreign folk have obtained fake marriage licenses without the spouse in question even knowing they've been married off! We've all been asked to check our marital status in person or via a website, so they can get to the bottom of this. (Thank goodness, I'm still listed as single!)
Dorothy, a domestic worker, found out she was married - to a Sohail Razique from Pakistan, whom she had never heard of.
So what did Dorothy do? She packed her goods and arrived at his doorstep, ready to move in, armed with a camera crew and reporter.
And what did Sohail do? Well, first tried to deny it, then explain it away, then call his "real" wife (who apparently works in the department issuing marriage certificates and ID documents). She didn't turn up. When Sohail produced her ID book, it was Dorothy's stolen one, but with a different photo.
But who DID turn up was the sheriff, with a summons. Dorothy is suing Sohail for 50 thousand bucks. Bet he wishes he'd never left Pakistan.
(Full story and more here)
There's a huge marriage scam that's been uncovered in South Africa. A number of foreign folk have obtained fake marriage licenses without the spouse in question even knowing they've been married off! We've all been asked to check our marital status in person or via a website, so they can get to the bottom of this. (Thank goodness, I'm still listed as single!)
Dorothy, a domestic worker, found out she was married - to a Sohail Razique from Pakistan, whom she had never heard of.
So what did Dorothy do? She packed her goods and arrived at his doorstep, ready to move in, armed with a camera crew and reporter.
And what did Sohail do? Well, first tried to deny it, then explain it away, then call his "real" wife (who apparently works in the department issuing marriage certificates and ID documents). She didn't turn up. When Sohail produced her ID book, it was Dorothy's stolen one, but with a different photo.
But who DID turn up was the sheriff, with a summons. Dorothy is suing Sohail for 50 thousand bucks. Bet he wishes he'd never left Pakistan.
(Full story and more here)
The Jesus I don't yet know
I'm just past the first chapter of reading Yancey's "The Jesus I Never Knew". It's fitted in very well with the first chapter of McClaren's "A Generous Orthodoxy"! And a post at NotPerfection challenged my image of what Jesus looked like too.
Having grown up in one denomination and never even attended another until a few years ago, I had no idea of how "stereotyped" my image of Jesus might be. I didn't realize that different branches of Christianity might see Him differently, might emphasize different traits or "functions" of His presence on earth.
I'm on a learning curve though!
My ideas and beliefs have been hugely challenged since I started blogging a year back. Things I've taken for granted everyone believed, it seems not many do. I'd never even heard God referred to as "she" until a year back, and it was a bit of a shock! It wasn't the only one - I've had all sorts of brain-stretching going on since then.
I've still got a long way to go to learn about who Jesus is to me. I'm only at the beginning. I'm scratching the very surface yet, with a long long way to go until I hit the "meat" of a personal relationship with and love for this GodMan.
But last night I wondered - what if God, what if Jesus actually is different for each of us? What if for those who need Him to be feminine, He looks like a woman, acts like a woman, is a woman, and has felt a woman's pain? What if for those of us who need Him to be Asian, or African, or Indian, He actually is - along with knowing the issues and struggles each of these groups go through?
What if when we meet Him face to face He won't just look like one thing to all of us, won't just have one face, but will be visible to each of us differently?
Would that make it easier for us to know Him and love Him?
Having grown up in one denomination and never even attended another until a few years ago, I had no idea of how "stereotyped" my image of Jesus might be. I didn't realize that different branches of Christianity might see Him differently, might emphasize different traits or "functions" of His presence on earth.
I'm on a learning curve though!
My ideas and beliefs have been hugely challenged since I started blogging a year back. Things I've taken for granted everyone believed, it seems not many do. I'd never even heard God referred to as "she" until a year back, and it was a bit of a shock! It wasn't the only one - I've had all sorts of brain-stretching going on since then.
I've still got a long way to go to learn about who Jesus is to me. I'm only at the beginning. I'm scratching the very surface yet, with a long long way to go until I hit the "meat" of a personal relationship with and love for this GodMan.
But last night I wondered - what if God, what if Jesus actually is different for each of us? What if for those who need Him to be feminine, He looks like a woman, acts like a woman, is a woman, and has felt a woman's pain? What if for those of us who need Him to be Asian, or African, or Indian, He actually is - along with knowing the issues and struggles each of these groups go through?
What if when we meet Him face to face He won't just look like one thing to all of us, won't just have one face, but will be visible to each of us differently?
Would that make it easier for us to know Him and love Him?
South African Darwin Award Entry
Remember the Darwin awards? Folk killing themselves in amusing/interesting/mind-boggling ways? (I still love the one about the guy who attached a jet engine to his car...)
Well, South Africa has a potential entry for those awards....
Well, South Africa has a potential entry for those awards....
Responding to Human Crisis
Two things I've wanted to link to, but didn't get around to last week:
Over at LivingRoom, Darren points out why we react more to a few hundred deaths in Russia than thousands of deaths in Sudan.
And David at NotPerfection has 800 words, no pictures after the Russian hostage crisis.
Really good stuff. Go read them both.
Over at LivingRoom, Darren points out why we react more to a few hundred deaths in Russia than thousands of deaths in Sudan.
And David at NotPerfection has 800 words, no pictures after the Russian hostage crisis.
Really good stuff. Go read them both.
Kelly
"I've wanted to call you so many times this past year," she said. "How are you?" I asked. "Terrible," she responded.
Kelly joined the church about 5 years ago, after a health & evangelism series of meetings held by one of our more conservative congregations. She threw herself fanatically into the new things she'd learned, but outside of church walls still struggled with a drug and alcohol addiction. She joined the before-church cell group I attended, and from the word go was a bird of a different feather. Everyone else dressed up for church - she turned up in jeans that smelt like the last cigarette she'd had on the way there. We all put on our happy church faces - she swore over the hard week she was having. We sang - she sat silent.
Yet on some level we connected. The cell group did what they could to help her, and she stuck around longer than I did.
A few months ago I ran into her at a school function. She was avoiding someone from the cell group. She was angry with her, for a reason I could never discover.
And this weekend she told me she left the group a year ago. She never wants to see "those people" again, and will do anything it takes to avoid running into them. She's attending one of the other congregations, but it's only pew-warming. No-one seems to notice that she's going through hell. No-one cares.
She knows I left, and she knows I can relate to her view. Although I have no experience with drug addiction and so many of her other struggles, I do know all about wanting out of a church, about hurt and a lack of support, about struggling and searching. When I left, no-one checked up on me either. I guess that's what happens to "backsliders"...
We're peas in a pod in some ways. She's seen something of her in me, something she wants to - needs to - connect with.
There's a part of me that wants to be the expert, to take over aspects of her life and guide her - help her clean the house that's bothering her, take control of her time and organization, give her coping mechanisms to enable her to take a deep breath every now and then, go chasing after all those nasty people who owe her money. There's a pretty overbearing part of me that wants to state "I have the answer/s!".
But there's a part of me that says "who the hell do you think you are?" - a part that says I'm no expert and perhaps what she needs now is just a shoulder to lean on, someone who will be there when she falls, who will check in on her and see how her day is going, who will pray for her and love her unconditionally.
I've got to fight the controlling me and bring the loving me to the fore. And whatever I do, I can't forget her. I get the feeling this is a life-or-death spiritual struggle, and if I'm her only lifeline I can't let go.
I'm checking in with her today, and instead of mouthing off on what I think she should do, I'm just going to listen.
Kelly joined the church about 5 years ago, after a health & evangelism series of meetings held by one of our more conservative congregations. She threw herself fanatically into the new things she'd learned, but outside of church walls still struggled with a drug and alcohol addiction. She joined the before-church cell group I attended, and from the word go was a bird of a different feather. Everyone else dressed up for church - she turned up in jeans that smelt like the last cigarette she'd had on the way there. We all put on our happy church faces - she swore over the hard week she was having. We sang - she sat silent.
Yet on some level we connected. The cell group did what they could to help her, and she stuck around longer than I did.
A few months ago I ran into her at a school function. She was avoiding someone from the cell group. She was angry with her, for a reason I could never discover.
And this weekend she told me she left the group a year ago. She never wants to see "those people" again, and will do anything it takes to avoid running into them. She's attending one of the other congregations, but it's only pew-warming. No-one seems to notice that she's going through hell. No-one cares.
She knows I left, and she knows I can relate to her view. Although I have no experience with drug addiction and so many of her other struggles, I do know all about wanting out of a church, about hurt and a lack of support, about struggling and searching. When I left, no-one checked up on me either. I guess that's what happens to "backsliders"...
We're peas in a pod in some ways. She's seen something of her in me, something she wants to - needs to - connect with.
There's a part of me that wants to be the expert, to take over aspects of her life and guide her - help her clean the house that's bothering her, take control of her time and organization, give her coping mechanisms to enable her to take a deep breath every now and then, go chasing after all those nasty people who owe her money. There's a pretty overbearing part of me that wants to state "I have the answer/s!".
But there's a part of me that says "who the hell do you think you are?" - a part that says I'm no expert and perhaps what she needs now is just a shoulder to lean on, someone who will be there when she falls, who will check in on her and see how her day is going, who will pray for her and love her unconditionally.
I've got to fight the controlling me and bring the loving me to the fore. And whatever I do, I can't forget her. I get the feeling this is a life-or-death spiritual struggle, and if I'm her only lifeline I can't let go.
I'm checking in with her today, and instead of mouthing off on what I think she should do, I'm just going to listen.
Shabbat Shalom
Lord, as I prepare to spend the day in Your presence,
...turn my mind to Your business, not mine
...let me see everyone, EVERYONE, around me through Your eyes as Your children
...tune my heart in to Your voice, whispered words only I can understand
...calm my soul and slow my steps
...open my eyes to the little things I miss as I rush through each weekday
...bless and refresh me, bathe me in Your love, renew my spirit
The End of the Age
Am I the only one? Every time I watch the news lately, these phrases from Matthew 24 flash through my brain:
"You will hear of wars and rumours of wars ... nation will rise against nation and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places ... you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me ... many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, and many false prophets will appear and decieve many people ... the love of most will grow cold ... the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky and the heavenly bodies will be shaken ... when you see all these things, you know that it is near, right at the door."
Is there any doubt that things on this planet are coming to a head? And if they are, why are we so complacent, happily bumbling around with our heads down, seeing nought but the ground in front of our feet and the things around us, never bothering to look up and see what is even at the door?
"You will hear of wars and rumours of wars ... nation will rise against nation and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places ... you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me ... many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, and many false prophets will appear and decieve many people ... the love of most will grow cold ... the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky and the heavenly bodies will be shaken ... when you see all these things, you know that it is near, right at the door."
Is there any doubt that things on this planet are coming to a head? And if they are, why are we so complacent, happily bumbling around with our heads down, seeing nought but the ground in front of our feet and the things around us, never bothering to look up and see what is even at the door?
Gmail
I've acquired a gmail account. If you'd like to use it, you can contact me at michelle dot bainbridge at gmail dot com. With a prospective job change in the future, this will probably become my only email address once I leave this position.
Funny, last night I was just thinking I should try set up a gmail account, and whaddayaknow, this morning someone had sent me an invite! :)
Funny, last night I was just thinking I should try set up a gmail account, and whaddayaknow, this morning someone had sent me an invite! :)
Yesterday, Today, ... Tomorrow?
Yesterday Blogger wouldn't publish a blessed thing. It worked this morning, and all those back-posts went up no prob.
Today, Haloscan has decided to pack up. No comments or trackback. Great.
Tomorrow - what could POSSIBLY not work tomorrow? Well, hopefully it won't be as bad as one of my favourite blogs. When I stopped by this morning, I found "this service has been discontinued..." I see it's back up now though.
It's amazing how much I've come to rely on my internet connection, haloscan or blogger working. And end up many days with an either/or performance.
Matt recently lost his entire blog and had to start again. I'm wondering if there's a way to back up all the stuff I've written over the past year - and if it's actually worth backing up to anyone other than myself.
::update:: Yay! Comments are back... someone in the USA just woke up and realized their system had gone down.
Today, Haloscan has decided to pack up. No comments or trackback. Great.
Tomorrow - what could POSSIBLY not work tomorrow? Well, hopefully it won't be as bad as one of my favourite blogs. When I stopped by this morning, I found "this service has been discontinued..." I see it's back up now though.
It's amazing how much I've come to rely on my internet connection, haloscan or blogger working. And end up many days with an either/or performance.
Matt recently lost his entire blog and had to start again. I'm wondering if there's a way to back up all the stuff I've written over the past year - and if it's actually worth backing up to anyone other than myself.
::update:: Yay! Comments are back... someone in the USA just woke up and realized their system had gone down.
A Generous Orthodoxy
If you're wondering what Brian McClaren's new book is all about, the first chapter (with intro etc.) is online as a .pdf file here:
Youth Specialities - 62 pages
Good for those of us involved in the conversation, who are still waiting for the book to arrive! :)
Youth Specialities - 62 pages
Good for those of us involved in the conversation, who are still waiting for the book to arrive! :)
Behold, I do a new thing!
I'm in the middle of redesigning our entire college website. Do you know what a MISSION that is???
The current site was designed by a guy who didn't know what the heck he was doing. I've spent most of the past 2 years just cleaning up his "spiderweb" structure into a "tree" structure, fixing links, making layout the same across pages, correcting his grammar etc. The site is by no means ideal at the moment, but it DOES contain the most up-to-date info on the college, and for the first time in history our entire yearbook is online, along with downloadable application forms. So I've made some progress. Unfortunately every now and then some nasy person sends me a nasty email telling me the website is crap. If they could only have seen the previous one...
By the end of this year, I want to have an entirely new, easy to navigate, info-rich site up and running. It ain't easy though. There's a culture of non-providing of requested information, of apathy when you ask for stuff. And then there are the old stick-in-the-muds who come up with the most interesting objections to having their course info online. Stuff I never even thought would be an issue.
Working through my Dreamweaver course, I'm trying to integrate a good-looking interactive site with the fact that we're living in the 3rd-world and many of our visitors may not be completely up-to-date on the technology needed to access the site. I'm hoping to use CSS for easy layout changes, but am still trying to get my brain around it, and how to use it with other design elements. It's a LOT of work just to get the site design right, never mind insert the info.
If I can pull this one off, it's going to be awesome! I only hope I CAN pull it off. The website was given to me to do "in my spare time" (what???), with no extra pay for taking it on. And from now until March my "usual" work (the stuff my job description says I'm here for) is going to be full-throttle running back and forth. Add to that my responsibility for updating and publishing all our info books / yearbook / promotional materials, and I'm starting to think I may need more hours in the day.
But I have to admit, I enjoy creating good stuff, things that look great and work well. And if everything goes according to plan, the website will be one of those good stuff things once I'm done with it.
The current site was designed by a guy who didn't know what the heck he was doing. I've spent most of the past 2 years just cleaning up his "spiderweb" structure into a "tree" structure, fixing links, making layout the same across pages, correcting his grammar etc. The site is by no means ideal at the moment, but it DOES contain the most up-to-date info on the college, and for the first time in history our entire yearbook is online, along with downloadable application forms. So I've made some progress. Unfortunately every now and then some nasy person sends me a nasty email telling me the website is crap. If they could only have seen the previous one...
By the end of this year, I want to have an entirely new, easy to navigate, info-rich site up and running. It ain't easy though. There's a culture of non-providing of requested information, of apathy when you ask for stuff. And then there are the old stick-in-the-muds who come up with the most interesting objections to having their course info online. Stuff I never even thought would be an issue.
Working through my Dreamweaver course, I'm trying to integrate a good-looking interactive site with the fact that we're living in the 3rd-world and many of our visitors may not be completely up-to-date on the technology needed to access the site. I'm hoping to use CSS for easy layout changes, but am still trying to get my brain around it, and how to use it with other design elements. It's a LOT of work just to get the site design right, never mind insert the info.
If I can pull this one off, it's going to be awesome! I only hope I CAN pull it off. The website was given to me to do "in my spare time" (what???), with no extra pay for taking it on. And from now until March my "usual" work (the stuff my job description says I'm here for) is going to be full-throttle running back and forth. Add to that my responsibility for updating and publishing all our info books / yearbook / promotional materials, and I'm starting to think I may need more hours in the day.
But I have to admit, I enjoy creating good stuff, things that look great and work well. And if everything goes according to plan, the website will be one of those good stuff things once I'm done with it.
Verse of the Day
Since August 13, the verse of the day on Our Daily Blog has been this one:
"Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
James 4:7 (ESV)"
I wonder if Andrew has forgotten to update it, or if it's going to just stay stuck at that verse until I actually DO submit myself to God?
"Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
James 4:7 (ESV)"
I wonder if Andrew has forgotten to update it, or if it's going to just stay stuck at that verse until I actually DO submit myself to God?
Seeking God's Will
It just struck me this morning. Hard.
I've been getting all excited about my business opportunity, planning things out, investigating start-up options, even imagining what the place will look like.
But I've forgotten to ask God if this is what He wants me to do!
It's a trend with me, I'm afriad. I have a friend that will stop and pray before she responds, but I barge in and pray later. Usually when I slow down enough to remember that I've actually committed my life to God, so should follow His lead. Sometimes only when I get myself into a tight corner.
I don't know how I can change my bull-in-a-china-shop approach and learn to first seek His face before I act. Maybe it's a sign of rot in the soul, or skewed priorities.
Before I take one more step along this exciting road, I'm going to have to pause and ask "Is this right? Is this Your will? Can you bless me in this?" I hope the answer is yes, but if it isn't...
I've been getting all excited about my business opportunity, planning things out, investigating start-up options, even imagining what the place will look like.
But I've forgotten to ask God if this is what He wants me to do!
It's a trend with me, I'm afriad. I have a friend that will stop and pray before she responds, but I barge in and pray later. Usually when I slow down enough to remember that I've actually committed my life to God, so should follow His lead. Sometimes only when I get myself into a tight corner.
I don't know how I can change my bull-in-a-china-shop approach and learn to first seek His face before I act. Maybe it's a sign of rot in the soul, or skewed priorities.
Before I take one more step along this exciting road, I'm going to have to pause and ask "Is this right? Is this Your will? Can you bless me in this?" I hope the answer is yes, but if it isn't...
Dog-eared
Watching the news this morning, they had an ad on for the local production of "Phantom of the Opera". My dog was sitting next to me, waiting for crusts from above while I ate breakfast, and I wondered what he hears when we hear music. Does it make any sense at all to a dog, or is it just a cacophony of noise? When we sing, does he wonder what the heck that sound is coming out our mouths? Or does he simply just not care?
I know they pick up sounds they recognize - there's one ad where a lady whistles for her dog, much the same way we do for ours, and they usually jump up to see who is calling them. But dog-food ads, filled with barking dogs, they usually ignore (perhaps the message those dogs are barking is irrelevant). Only one other time has one of the dogs noticed a dog on the TV - barking or whining, not sure which - and pricked up his ears.
I know dogs only see certain colours, but I wonder what they hear...
I know they pick up sounds they recognize - there's one ad where a lady whistles for her dog, much the same way we do for ours, and they usually jump up to see who is calling them. But dog-food ads, filled with barking dogs, they usually ignore (perhaps the message those dogs are barking is irrelevant). Only one other time has one of the dogs noticed a dog on the TV - barking or whining, not sure which - and pricked up his ears.
I know dogs only see certain colours, but I wonder what they hear...
Brain on Fire
Please excuse the silence. My brain is working overtime, and I fear smoke will soon start pouring out my ears! So, here's today's bits and pieces in brief:
* I'm having great fun playing with Dreamweaver (also known as studying). Unfortunately the website I manage contains elements that are not compatible with this latest version of the programme, so am also having to make adjustments as I discover uneditables, weird layout etc. But by the time I'm done with this course, we're going to have one awesome site.
* My mind's on overdrive regarding the business opportunity I mentioned yesterday. I keep finding new possibilities, I keep adding ideas. I need to get it all down on paper/hard-drive before I lose it.
* Thinking hard regarding our potential Australian move too - in light of the above. I'll have to sit down with the parents and discuss their plans when they arrive (3 weeks and counting...). But in chatting with a sis-in-law today, it struck me that this just feels RIGHT. Also got a bit of background as to why my brother would offer his help, and I think getting involved might bring us closer together as the 3 kids and our families.
* Been trying to figure out how to convert our college magazines for web access from print to ebook, or from Corel file to ebook - and am coming up major blank at the moment. Unfortunately it was designed with a weird layout in Corel, or I'd have it done quickly. And scanning the magazine isn't helping either.... Something new to learn, I guess.
* Jen's asked me to be a part of the "A Generous Orthodoxy" blog. Still trying to figure out what to post as an introduction, and whether I'll even be able to understand the book I'm supposed to be commenting on! :) I feel completely unqualified to do so, and may just have to keep a dictionary handy to make sense of what I read. I haven't read any emerging church-type books, only online articles and opinions, so this will be a first.
* But, talking books, I received Yancey's "The Jesus I Never Knew" today. Looking forward to reading it, starting tonight.
* Trying to get my head around the rest of my work and studies, but facing MAJOR procrastination urges.... :)
And that's about it for now! All deep thoughts and interesting posts will have to wait for another day.
* I'm having great fun playing with Dreamweaver (also known as studying). Unfortunately the website I manage contains elements that are not compatible with this latest version of the programme, so am also having to make adjustments as I discover uneditables, weird layout etc. But by the time I'm done with this course, we're going to have one awesome site.
* My mind's on overdrive regarding the business opportunity I mentioned yesterday. I keep finding new possibilities, I keep adding ideas. I need to get it all down on paper/hard-drive before I lose it.
* Thinking hard regarding our potential Australian move too - in light of the above. I'll have to sit down with the parents and discuss their plans when they arrive (3 weeks and counting...). But in chatting with a sis-in-law today, it struck me that this just feels RIGHT. Also got a bit of background as to why my brother would offer his help, and I think getting involved might bring us closer together as the 3 kids and our families.
* Been trying to figure out how to convert our college magazines for web access from print to ebook, or from Corel file to ebook - and am coming up major blank at the moment. Unfortunately it was designed with a weird layout in Corel, or I'd have it done quickly. And scanning the magazine isn't helping either.... Something new to learn, I guess.
* Jen's asked me to be a part of the "A Generous Orthodoxy" blog. Still trying to figure out what to post as an introduction, and whether I'll even be able to understand the book I'm supposed to be commenting on! :) I feel completely unqualified to do so, and may just have to keep a dictionary handy to make sense of what I read. I haven't read any emerging church-type books, only online articles and opinions, so this will be a first.
* But, talking books, I received Yancey's "The Jesus I Never Knew" today. Looking forward to reading it, starting tonight.
* Trying to get my head around the rest of my work and studies, but facing MAJOR procrastination urges.... :)
And that's about it for now! All deep thoughts and interesting posts will have to wait for another day.
If all else fails, read the instructions!
Oh silly me. I was panicking over a textbook that arrived a month late for my studies, and today have been frantically working at it, wondering how on earth it fits in with the assignment I'm supposed to complete within 3 weeks - only to discover that the textbook is the NEXT assignment, not this one, and that all the instructions I need I already have in the course materials I received months ago.
OK, I admit - I'm having fun with the textbook! Discovering all sorts of cool stuff with Dreamweaver, and that means I'm ahead of where I need to be for the last assignment. But I'm now behind on this one. Not that it's that difficult an assignment. I have the basic knowledge already, unlike some who seem to be with me in this course boat, so it won't be too difficult. The real meat is what I've just been using up my time on.
But today I'm truly living up to my hair colour. Oh geez... :)
OK, I admit - I'm having fun with the textbook! Discovering all sorts of cool stuff with Dreamweaver, and that means I'm ahead of where I need to be for the last assignment. But I'm now behind on this one. Not that it's that difficult an assignment. I have the basic knowledge already, unlike some who seem to be with me in this course boat, so it won't be too difficult. The real meat is what I've just been using up my time on.
But today I'm truly living up to my hair colour. Oh geez... :)
Sabbath Snippet
Sabbath was a soul-plunge, a nature immersion.
The day started out sunny and warm, so breakfast was enjoyed outside with dew on the toes and warmth on my cheek. The sea was covered by a layer of mist, but up against the mountain the air was filled with birds and blue sky and sunshine.
Around 9:30 the mist suddenly rolled in, thick enough to see whisps drifting past your face. That just begged further investigation. We rounded up the dogs and headed into the nearby field - its ends disappeared, leaving us in a cottonwool bubble. We headed up the mountain and into the forest along well-worn contour paths, finding new moss and mushrooms, hills disappering into mist and leaving us on an island.
Later that afternoon the mist lifted and formed itself into scudding clouds. We took a long drive through blossoming orchards and fields strewn with tiny spring flowers. Mountains in shadow and speckled with sunbeams. New calves and foals against pure green. Sweet, huge strawberries fresh from the field - aah the taste of spring. A single yellow-fuzzed duckling drifting on the lake with mom, the beauty of golden cheetah fur in long grass at the rescue project.
God's Creator-beauty is astounding! Want evidence of His all-consuming love for you? Stop, look around. It's all over!
The day started out sunny and warm, so breakfast was enjoyed outside with dew on the toes and warmth on my cheek. The sea was covered by a layer of mist, but up against the mountain the air was filled with birds and blue sky and sunshine.
Around 9:30 the mist suddenly rolled in, thick enough to see whisps drifting past your face. That just begged further investigation. We rounded up the dogs and headed into the nearby field - its ends disappeared, leaving us in a cottonwool bubble. We headed up the mountain and into the forest along well-worn contour paths, finding new moss and mushrooms, hills disappering into mist and leaving us on an island.
Later that afternoon the mist lifted and formed itself into scudding clouds. We took a long drive through blossoming orchards and fields strewn with tiny spring flowers. Mountains in shadow and speckled with sunbeams. New calves and foals against pure green. Sweet, huge strawberries fresh from the field - aah the taste of spring. A single yellow-fuzzed duckling drifting on the lake with mom, the beauty of golden cheetah fur in long grass at the rescue project.
God's Creator-beauty is astounding! Want evidence of His all-consuming love for you? Stop, look around. It's all over!
Un.Be.Lievable
I had a bit of a mind-blower yesterday. My brother and his wife (A & M) dropped by for a visit after a year or so not dropping by. That was pretty cool in itself. They came bearing gifts, and a playstation for my son to borrow - even cooler! They stayed for 2 hours, and brought their dogs to visit - very cool. My son was not feeling great, so they made the trip to the nearest shop, using their own money, and stocked up on VitC, medicine and a box of Smarties - wow... A then offered to get 40 metres of fabric at a huge discount for me to make slipcovers for my couches - great!
And then came the mind-blowing stuff. We somehow got onto the subject of my web design studies, and perhaps using that as a future career. Then got into my dream of opening a vegetarian restuarant/coffee shop/deli in the area. M is vegetarian, A was raised one. They know how difficult it is to find good vegetarian food, and they know that I am good at making it. They've received home-made gifts of bread and muffin mixes, they've over-eaten my cooking when we spend mealtimes together.
But this has been one of those impossible dreams, dreamed for years with no chance of fulfilment. I cannot afford to start my own business at all. I can barely afford to keep food on the table most months. Which makes what happened next so incredible.
My brother, my "rich" businessman brother, has offered to get me set up in business! Not sometime in the next few years, but as he put it "now is a good season to get going on this". As in NOW...
OK Lord, I know I've been praying "get me outta here!" every time I run into yet another hassle at work, I know I've been dreaming about doing something different, something I'd love to do, but this is kinda sudden, You know? And I do like my view, and the fact that we're safe here, and that it's so comfortable that it's hard to move.... But is this Your answer to all those questions about "what next"?
I didn't sleep very solidly last night, my mind in a whirl, amazed that my brother would do something so huge for me, jolted into thinking of possibilities, and a little bit terrified at taking such a big step.
However, this IS going to take a little research, market probing, starting from home to see what will sell and what won't, establishing of a client base etc. It's not about to change overnight. It's going to mean getting off my (slightly oversized) butt and making things happen. It's going to cost me time and effort and energy. I'll have to work at unique and wonderful products that will guarantee income in the future. I'll have to register my label/trademark. There's a pretty lengthy list of things that need to be investigated and done!
But wow - this is just so completely mind-blowing, and I'm still sorta in a state of shock...
And then came the mind-blowing stuff. We somehow got onto the subject of my web design studies, and perhaps using that as a future career. Then got into my dream of opening a vegetarian restuarant/coffee shop/deli in the area. M is vegetarian, A was raised one. They know how difficult it is to find good vegetarian food, and they know that I am good at making it. They've received home-made gifts of bread and muffin mixes, they've over-eaten my cooking when we spend mealtimes together.
But this has been one of those impossible dreams, dreamed for years with no chance of fulfilment. I cannot afford to start my own business at all. I can barely afford to keep food on the table most months. Which makes what happened next so incredible.
My brother, my "rich" businessman brother, has offered to get me set up in business! Not sometime in the next few years, but as he put it "now is a good season to get going on this". As in NOW...
OK Lord, I know I've been praying "get me outta here!" every time I run into yet another hassle at work, I know I've been dreaming about doing something different, something I'd love to do, but this is kinda sudden, You know? And I do like my view, and the fact that we're safe here, and that it's so comfortable that it's hard to move.... But is this Your answer to all those questions about "what next"?
I didn't sleep very solidly last night, my mind in a whirl, amazed that my brother would do something so huge for me, jolted into thinking of possibilities, and a little bit terrified at taking such a big step.
However, this IS going to take a little research, market probing, starting from home to see what will sell and what won't, establishing of a client base etc. It's not about to change overnight. It's going to mean getting off my (slightly oversized) butt and making things happen. It's going to cost me time and effort and energy. I'll have to work at unique and wonderful products that will guarantee income in the future. I'll have to register my label/trademark. There's a pretty lengthy list of things that need to be investigated and done!
But wow - this is just so completely mind-blowing, and I'm still sorta in a state of shock...
Shabbat Shalom
It's been a very rushed and very stressful day for me - everything that can go wrong (nearly), has gone wrong (but I count my blessings that I am not a hostage, nor is my child - oh Lord, protect those children!). I haven't had time to blog, I haven't even had time to take a deep breath. And it's on days like this that I really look forward to my weekly Sabbath.
For me it's a time of refreshing, renewal, peace, quiet, a time to slow down and connect with God and others.
It's a day to sleep in - especially good this weekend as there's a lot of rain on the way, and there's no sound like heavy rain on the huge arum lily leaves just outside my bedroom window. It's a bit like rain on a tin roof.
It's a day to catch up on some spiritual reading, to learn and expand my thoughts in new directions. I usually print out a variety of articles off the net during the week to read - some widely differing views most days.
It's a time for me to spend with my son Jason - Friday night is "talk night", with no interruptions.
It's a time to get out in nature (weather permitting) with the dogs, to admire the new growth of spring and to discover the secret treasures God has left within His creation for us to find.
It's a time for slow food, an hour or two spent in the kitchen creating dishes we don't have time for in the week, and a few more hours spent enjoying them.
It's a time for me to connect with others - we often have a meal with family or friends, though most weeks it's just us.
And it's a time where I can completely drop the stresses of the week, the hassles and pressures and rushing to and fro, and just Be.
Shabbat Shalom!
For me it's a time of refreshing, renewal, peace, quiet, a time to slow down and connect with God and others.
It's a day to sleep in - especially good this weekend as there's a lot of rain on the way, and there's no sound like heavy rain on the huge arum lily leaves just outside my bedroom window. It's a bit like rain on a tin roof.
It's a day to catch up on some spiritual reading, to learn and expand my thoughts in new directions. I usually print out a variety of articles off the net during the week to read - some widely differing views most days.
It's a time for me to spend with my son Jason - Friday night is "talk night", with no interruptions.
It's a time to get out in nature (weather permitting) with the dogs, to admire the new growth of spring and to discover the secret treasures God has left within His creation for us to find.
It's a time for slow food, an hour or two spent in the kitchen creating dishes we don't have time for in the week, and a few more hours spent enjoying them.
It's a time for me to connect with others - we often have a meal with family or friends, though most weeks it's just us.
And it's a time where I can completely drop the stresses of the week, the hassles and pressures and rushing to and fro, and just Be.
Shabbat Shalom!
Slow Down!
Jen's post pointed me in the direction of Ode magazine this morning. Of course I just had to go trawling through their archives to get a feel for what they're all about.
One of their past issues was "Slow".
Life doesn’t always have to be about rush, rush, rush. Many people are discovering slow as the answer to a out-of-control world. Not in an effort to swear off modern life, but in order to enjoy it more. Ode explores a new movement.
It's not a new movement, but it's one that too few of us take notice of.
I know I dream of slowing down, of spending hours cooking and eating good food with family and friends, of wandering instead of rushing, and doing nothing instead of multitasking. But when push comes to shove, I fall back into my old habits of quick food, no time - and it leaves me exhausted. I'm still struggling to find that all-important balance.
Go read this article and take it as a challenge to rethink how you're using your time today.
::more thoughts::
I have to wonder if sometimes our lack of connection in our attempts at worship is an offshoot from our rushed lives. We want fast food, fast religion, multi-task worship/play spaces - and then wonder why the one hour we attempt to worship in, once a week, doesn't work for us.
Slowing down, slowing our entire lives down!, may just be the shot in the arm we need to redirect our lives, to refocus on the things that matter and the One we should be all about.
(Something similar mentioned by Conrad today after a visit to Furness Abbey.)
One of their past issues was "Slow".
Life doesn’t always have to be about rush, rush, rush. Many people are discovering slow as the answer to a out-of-control world. Not in an effort to swear off modern life, but in order to enjoy it more. Ode explores a new movement.
It's not a new movement, but it's one that too few of us take notice of.
I know I dream of slowing down, of spending hours cooking and eating good food with family and friends, of wandering instead of rushing, and doing nothing instead of multitasking. But when push comes to shove, I fall back into my old habits of quick food, no time - and it leaves me exhausted. I'm still struggling to find that all-important balance.
Go read this article and take it as a challenge to rethink how you're using your time today.
::more thoughts::
I have to wonder if sometimes our lack of connection in our attempts at worship is an offshoot from our rushed lives. We want fast food, fast religion, multi-task worship/play spaces - and then wonder why the one hour we attempt to worship in, once a week, doesn't work for us.
Slowing down, slowing our entire lives down!, may just be the shot in the arm we need to redirect our lives, to refocus on the things that matter and the One we should be all about.
(Something similar mentioned by Conrad today after a visit to Furness Abbey.)
Between the Covers
I've got a huge collection (around 120) of Reader's Digest Condensed Books. Most of them were picked up at old library stock clearances, flea markets and garage sales - few of them cost me more than 2 bucks a book. They're my "bath books". Every night I take a long, hot bath and read for an hour or so. I've perfected the art of turning a page and refilling the hot water when it gets a bit chilly.
I'm fascinated by what's between the covers of these old books - and not just the stories. Last night a folded piece of paper dropped out as I turned the page. All it had on it was "15 Feb Spit Braai" and two verses, Habakkuk 3:10 & Zephaniah 3:17. I wonder who put it there? I wonder what these verses meant to them, and if the spit braai (barbecue) was with family or friends, if it was a time to remember? This same book has "Sorrell" written in pencil along the "spine" of the page edges - wonder what that's all about?
In another volume I found a bookmark, a souvenir of a trip to one of the big British cathedrals. Often there are names scribbled in the front, or cryptic numbers and letters.
With my overactive imagination, I find myself wondering what the story behind these books is. Who owned them? Did they read and re-read them as I do? Were they treasured, or seen as just another pile of papers? And what of the person who read them - what stories would they tell? Would their stories be even more fascinating than the ones printed on the page?
I'm fascinated by what's between the covers of these old books - and not just the stories. Last night a folded piece of paper dropped out as I turned the page. All it had on it was "15 Feb Spit Braai" and two verses, Habakkuk 3:10 & Zephaniah 3:17. I wonder who put it there? I wonder what these verses meant to them, and if the spit braai (barbecue) was with family or friends, if it was a time to remember? This same book has "Sorrell" written in pencil along the "spine" of the page edges - wonder what that's all about?
In another volume I found a bookmark, a souvenir of a trip to one of the big British cathedrals. Often there are names scribbled in the front, or cryptic numbers and letters.
With my overactive imagination, I find myself wondering what the story behind these books is. Who owned them? Did they read and re-read them as I do? Were they treasured, or seen as just another pile of papers? And what of the person who read them - what stories would they tell? Would their stories be even more fascinating than the ones printed on the page?
Trackback
I've added Trackback to my blog posts, thanks to Haloscan. Now would anyone care to tell me exactly what it is, and how it works? After a year of blogging, I'm only now getting up the courage to potentially live up to the being blonde thing - and just ask. :)
Blog Lite
Blogging may be on the lite side over the next few weeks. I've finally received a textbook for the next part of my studies - a month late! I have to now fit a 2 month assignment into 3 weeks, and it's all new stuff for me. However, if I do have something to say, and I need a break, this is where I'll probably end up. But now it's time to hit those books and figure out CSS & Dreamweaver!
Spring!
Spring has sprung
The grass is riz
I wonder where the birdies is?
The bird is on the wing!
But that is quite absurd
Because the wing is on the bird!
And what does the first day of spring look like? Well, remarkably like winter....
The grass is riz
I wonder where the birdies is?
The bird is on the wing!
But that is quite absurd
Because the wing is on the bird!
And what does the first day of spring look like? Well, remarkably like winter....
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