"Violence is not a substitute for a lack of intelligence"
- Augustine Chihure (Zimbabwe)
You know you're getting old when....
On Saturday night a couple of unusual things happened. My son went out to a movie on his own for the very first time, using his own money. And Favourite Man and I got a date night all to ourselves! :-)
Being long in the tooth, we didn't exactly paint the town red. We had a bit of an afternoon nap, then bought groceries, and had a quiet supper at the Spur. Yeah I know - the elderly out on the town and all...
And it was while waiting patiently outside the movies for the kid to arrive (another sign of age) that we saw something that really brought home how advanced in years we are.
There was the usual gaggle of assorted kids hanging around the entertainment areas, including a bunch of guys around my son's age. I merely glanced at them in passing. But then did a serious double-take.
One of the guys was dressed in shorts and takkies. Nothing unusual there. Except that he'd shaved his legs. Again, nothing unusual you say. Yah... but.... he'd shaved them in concentric circles going up the leg - a strip of hair, a strip of none, a strip of hair, a strip of none...!!! Kinda reminded me of a Dr Seuss book. And considering "Horton Hears a Who" is showing, perhaps the misguided young man was showing his adoration for his favourite author?
Whatever it was - fashion statement, dare or just plain silly - it was all I could do not to crack my jaw when it dropped to the floor, or stare. Giggling had to suffice, along with moving quickly on.
The youth of today! (rolls eyes)
Being long in the tooth, we didn't exactly paint the town red. We had a bit of an afternoon nap, then bought groceries, and had a quiet supper at the Spur. Yeah I know - the elderly out on the town and all...
And it was while waiting patiently outside the movies for the kid to arrive (another sign of age) that we saw something that really brought home how advanced in years we are.
There was the usual gaggle of assorted kids hanging around the entertainment areas, including a bunch of guys around my son's age. I merely glanced at them in passing. But then did a serious double-take.
One of the guys was dressed in shorts and takkies. Nothing unusual there. Except that he'd shaved his legs. Again, nothing unusual you say. Yah... but.... he'd shaved them in concentric circles going up the leg - a strip of hair, a strip of none, a strip of hair, a strip of none...!!! Kinda reminded me of a Dr Seuss book. And considering "Horton Hears a Who" is showing, perhaps the misguided young man was showing his adoration for his favourite author?
Whatever it was - fashion statement, dare or just plain silly - it was all I could do not to crack my jaw when it dropped to the floor, or stare. Giggling had to suffice, along with moving quickly on.
The youth of today! (rolls eyes)
Wishful Thinking
It's been a very long time since someone flipped the bird at me in traffic...
This weekend I was driving Favourite Man's Landy - sticking to the speed limit on pretty empty roads - when I noticed the roof of a low white car in my rear-view mirror. Only the roof, cos he was right up my exhaust pipe! He followed me around a turn, and then when the road widened to two lanes I pulled over and gave him space. Only to have him speed up until next to me, wave to get my attention, throw me the finger for holding him up - and speed off in his little white Chrysler!
How damn rude. On those empty roads he could easily have overtaken me at any time. There's no way I was going to speed - tickets are not only avoidable but seriously not worth the few extra seconds you gain breaking the law. Yet this idiot saw fit to be extremely rude.
I shouldn't have let it get to me, but for some reason I was very pissed off for a good few hours after that. Retrospect says I should have shown him the "little finger" in response - the one that indicates his muscle car is making up for a serious lack in other areas.... But retrospect doesn't help much at the time.
Other things I would have liked?
* To be driving Olivia - so I could ram him with my mega-strong bumper or at least give him a blast of the air-horns and a flash of the 16 lights on the front of her.
* Or to make as if I were going to turn into him in Favourite Man's truck and give him such a fright he veered off the road and messed up his chassis in the divider fynbos.
* Or perhaps that lovely flame-throwing anti-hijack device installed - one blast of fire spurting from the sides of my trucks would give him a nasty burn down that new white paint.
* Or maybe to see him miss the turn up ahead and flip his car.
* Or to have sped up, passed him, cut him off, then hauled him out his car and beaten him up with a tyre iron. Yes, girls can do that.
* Or to have noted his registration number and splashed it around the internet as "idiot in transit".
All these nasty, wishful-thinking thoughts. None of which would have helped much in the moment. But I console myself with a single thought. Karma will get him. :-)
This weekend I was driving Favourite Man's Landy - sticking to the speed limit on pretty empty roads - when I noticed the roof of a low white car in my rear-view mirror. Only the roof, cos he was right up my exhaust pipe! He followed me around a turn, and then when the road widened to two lanes I pulled over and gave him space. Only to have him speed up until next to me, wave to get my attention, throw me the finger for holding him up - and speed off in his little white Chrysler!
How damn rude. On those empty roads he could easily have overtaken me at any time. There's no way I was going to speed - tickets are not only avoidable but seriously not worth the few extra seconds you gain breaking the law. Yet this idiot saw fit to be extremely rude.
I shouldn't have let it get to me, but for some reason I was very pissed off for a good few hours after that. Retrospect says I should have shown him the "little finger" in response - the one that indicates his muscle car is making up for a serious lack in other areas.... But retrospect doesn't help much at the time.
Other things I would have liked?
* To be driving Olivia - so I could ram him with my mega-strong bumper or at least give him a blast of the air-horns and a flash of the 16 lights on the front of her.
* Or to make as if I were going to turn into him in Favourite Man's truck and give him such a fright he veered off the road and messed up his chassis in the divider fynbos.
* Or perhaps that lovely flame-throwing anti-hijack device installed - one blast of fire spurting from the sides of my trucks would give him a nasty burn down that new white paint.
* Or maybe to see him miss the turn up ahead and flip his car.
* Or to have sped up, passed him, cut him off, then hauled him out his car and beaten him up with a tyre iron. Yes, girls can do that.
* Or to have noted his registration number and splashed it around the internet as "idiot in transit".
All these nasty, wishful-thinking thoughts. None of which would have helped much in the moment. But I console myself with a single thought. Karma will get him. :-)
Boost
I've always been on the shy side - shy to the point of fading into the wallpaper wherever possible. I've never been the life of the party, nor the one who makes an entrance. In fact, in high school I'd go so far as to bunk a class rather than walk in late and have people look at me. Or worse, laugh. My most embarrasing moment in school came after I'd been crying in the toilets over something, decided to suck it up and go to class - and walked into the wrong class full of kids younger than me who cracked up laughing. Needless to say, it was back to the toilets for another cry.
Of course all this shyness left me with little self-confidence to put myself out there, to barge my way to success. Instead I'd shrink back and hope things would happen.
But not lately.
I appear to have been on a self-confidence growth curve over the past few months. I've been learning from an expert and have forced myself to do things that don't come naturally - every time they work out positively I get a boost.
Take yesterday, for example. I don't consider myself a good salesperson in any form. I hate asking for money from people, I don't have the natural ability to sell ice to Eskimos (though give me a captive market that I don't need to put myself out there for, and I'll make a killing). Yet I've needed to stick my shyness in my pocket and do this kind of thing recently. Yesterday I took some goods down to Cash Crusaders. Years ago I would simply have taken whatever pittance they offered - even if unreasonably low. Not yesterday. Not only did I bargain my way to max reward, but I even came away with a foreign-exchange deal I didn't go looking for. Which definitely gave me a boost! :-)
So this area of myself is slowly coming right. But there are many others where I'm still a shrinking violet, too tentative to let it all hang out, too fearful of being scoffed at or failing miserably, especially in the presence of experience that vastly exceeds mine. And when I do try and fail, it's the opposite of a boost - I'm less likely to try anything else.
Character flaw? Yes. Human? Of course. Me? Yup. Warts and all. But trying.
Of course all this shyness left me with little self-confidence to put myself out there, to barge my way to success. Instead I'd shrink back and hope things would happen.
But not lately.
I appear to have been on a self-confidence growth curve over the past few months. I've been learning from an expert and have forced myself to do things that don't come naturally - every time they work out positively I get a boost.
Take yesterday, for example. I don't consider myself a good salesperson in any form. I hate asking for money from people, I don't have the natural ability to sell ice to Eskimos (though give me a captive market that I don't need to put myself out there for, and I'll make a killing). Yet I've needed to stick my shyness in my pocket and do this kind of thing recently. Yesterday I took some goods down to Cash Crusaders. Years ago I would simply have taken whatever pittance they offered - even if unreasonably low. Not yesterday. Not only did I bargain my way to max reward, but I even came away with a foreign-exchange deal I didn't go looking for. Which definitely gave me a boost! :-)
So this area of myself is slowly coming right. But there are many others where I'm still a shrinking violet, too tentative to let it all hang out, too fearful of being scoffed at or failing miserably, especially in the presence of experience that vastly exceeds mine. And when I do try and fail, it's the opposite of a boost - I'm less likely to try anything else.
Character flaw? Yes. Human? Of course. Me? Yup. Warts and all. But trying.
Going Going Gone
I seem to have missed summer.
It's not that I haven't felt the heat, the oppressive just-under-the-roof oven temps that the upstairs bedrooms get. It's not that I haven't noticed the usual South-Easter howling furiously under the doors and destroying blinds day or night. Or sizzled my butt on vinyl climbing into Olivia's driver seat.
But this summer I worked in a permanently aircon-levelled temperature, where a mere small window shows the seasons pass outside - and not even opening the window gives an accurate indication of the weather out there. I've been constantly cold, dragging my jackets and jerseys to work on days where the rest of the world swelters - all thanks to the whims of those who control the aircon switch. And I've been working indoors too much too. This is the first year that my legs have stayed glow-in-the-dark white all summer. My arms have a "farmer's tan" from Landy work and driving, but the rest of me looks like summer's passed me by.
And it has.
I took a quick stroll to the mall next door over lunchtime through a day that's perfect summer. Yet I've had none of it. I've been at a desk today, staring at a screen, eyeing the mountains through the window now and then, or mentally escaping through the image of a Landy splashing through puddles on my wallpaper. By the time I go home the day will be done and I will have missed it. I will not have played in the mud or breathed 8 hours of fresh air and sunshine. I will not have lazed in the warm rays or felt hard-work sweat running down my spine. I will have missed it all.
Just like the rest of summer.
And for a summer-child, that's just terrible.
It's not that I haven't felt the heat, the oppressive just-under-the-roof oven temps that the upstairs bedrooms get. It's not that I haven't noticed the usual South-Easter howling furiously under the doors and destroying blinds day or night. Or sizzled my butt on vinyl climbing into Olivia's driver seat.
But this summer I worked in a permanently aircon-levelled temperature, where a mere small window shows the seasons pass outside - and not even opening the window gives an accurate indication of the weather out there. I've been constantly cold, dragging my jackets and jerseys to work on days where the rest of the world swelters - all thanks to the whims of those who control the aircon switch. And I've been working indoors too much too. This is the first year that my legs have stayed glow-in-the-dark white all summer. My arms have a "farmer's tan" from Landy work and driving, but the rest of me looks like summer's passed me by.
And it has.
I took a quick stroll to the mall next door over lunchtime through a day that's perfect summer. Yet I've had none of it. I've been at a desk today, staring at a screen, eyeing the mountains through the window now and then, or mentally escaping through the image of a Landy splashing through puddles on my wallpaper. By the time I go home the day will be done and I will have missed it. I will not have played in the mud or breathed 8 hours of fresh air and sunshine. I will not have lazed in the warm rays or felt hard-work sweat running down my spine. I will have missed it all.
Just like the rest of summer.
And for a summer-child, that's just terrible.
Finally
For the past 10 years I've had one item of clothing hanging in my cupboard. It's a "skort" - mini-length shorts with a cross-over skirt front that I bought on a whim for the one and only rave I went to (and looked damn hot in too with my knee-length leather boots and little red top!).
For the past 10 years I've not been able to fit into it. So why is it still hanging in my closet? Because it's my "one day" pants - the ones I've been aiming for when it comes to getting back the body I had. My "litmus test" of progress.
Today I was riffling through my belongings looking for something to wear, and thought - hmmm... I wonder....
I know I've lost weight in the last 2 years, though I really don't see it when I look in the mirror - I'm just going on the fact of clothes falling off and the word of others. It's been 6 months since I tried (and failed) to put that skort on. Today I gave it a shot - and not only could I put it on, but zip it up properly too!
I'm about 2cm away from it not being tight. And then there's the legs that need serious, SERIOUS work... no ways I'm going out in it yet!!! But I have a plan. :-) And it involves more than the legs.
Give me a few months and I might just brave it. Maybe.
For the past 10 years I've not been able to fit into it. So why is it still hanging in my closet? Because it's my "one day" pants - the ones I've been aiming for when it comes to getting back the body I had. My "litmus test" of progress.
Today I was riffling through my belongings looking for something to wear, and thought - hmmm... I wonder....
I know I've lost weight in the last 2 years, though I really don't see it when I look in the mirror - I'm just going on the fact of clothes falling off and the word of others. It's been 6 months since I tried (and failed) to put that skort on. Today I gave it a shot - and not only could I put it on, but zip it up properly too!
I'm about 2cm away from it not being tight. And then there's the legs that need serious, SERIOUS work... no ways I'm going out in it yet!!! But I have a plan. :-) And it involves more than the legs.
Give me a few months and I might just brave it. Maybe.
Meme
Red has insisted on tagging me to disclose 7 strange, weird or random things about myself.... The rules being:
# Link to the person who tagged you
# Post the rules here
# Share 7 random or weird facts about yourself
# Tag 7 random people at the end of the post, linking to them
# Leave a comment on their blog so that they know they've been tagged
I'm going to cheat and NOT tag anyone! :-)
So, without further ado, here they are.
1. When I walk, one arm swings more than the other.
2. I love the smell of creosote - the tar they stick on pine poles. Jeyes cleaner comes in a close second, but not quite :-)
3. One of my eyelids is rounder than the other. I don't think anyone other than myself has ever noticed this!
4. I can't dive into a pool headfirst. I used to be able to, but it suddenly changed one day and now it would feel like diving into set concrete.
5. I broke a toe thanks to Adrian Paul (the Highlander).
6. I don't mind limp lettuce at all - as long as it's in the form of leftover salad that's been marinating in it's dressing. If fact, it usually forms part of my lunch!
7. I'm shorter than I was a few years ago. And feeling even shorter in a household of taller-than-me men...
# Link to the person who tagged you
# Post the rules here
# Share 7 random or weird facts about yourself
# Tag 7 random people at the end of the post, linking to them
# Leave a comment on their blog so that they know they've been tagged
I'm going to cheat and NOT tag anyone! :-)
So, without further ado, here they are.
1. When I walk, one arm swings more than the other.
2. I love the smell of creosote - the tar they stick on pine poles. Jeyes cleaner comes in a close second, but not quite :-)
3. One of my eyelids is rounder than the other. I don't think anyone other than myself has ever noticed this!
4. I can't dive into a pool headfirst. I used to be able to, but it suddenly changed one day and now it would feel like diving into set concrete.
5. I broke a toe thanks to Adrian Paul (the Highlander).
6. I don't mind limp lettuce at all - as long as it's in the form of leftover salad that's been marinating in it's dressing. If fact, it usually forms part of my lunch!
7. I'm shorter than I was a few years ago. And feeling even shorter in a household of taller-than-me men...
She's a Maniac
I've been here at work for an hour and a half - and I have accomplished more in that time than I'm likely to during all the remaining hours of the day!
Although I don't like facing a half-dark commute or peering bleary-eyed at myself in the mirror while applying the daily war paint, there's much to be said for productive use of those first few hours of the day. Not only are you fresh out the starting blocks (well, usually.... at the very least you're fresh out of the duvet), but you get a first foot in the door with businesses, banks, colleagues etc who are just starting to fire up their daily systems. You're first in line, so you get dealt with quickly. And you get to sort out issues before your courage runs out too.
Then, while everyone else is still starting up their computers and pondering their working day, you get to take your first coffee break, knowing you've powered through enough stuff to end the day winding down - not up.
Here's to non-proctrastination! And a big cup of proper filter coffee.
Although I don't like facing a half-dark commute or peering bleary-eyed at myself in the mirror while applying the daily war paint, there's much to be said for productive use of those first few hours of the day. Not only are you fresh out the starting blocks (well, usually.... at the very least you're fresh out of the duvet), but you get a first foot in the door with businesses, banks, colleagues etc who are just starting to fire up their daily systems. You're first in line, so you get dealt with quickly. And you get to sort out issues before your courage runs out too.
Then, while everyone else is still starting up their computers and pondering their working day, you get to take your first coffee break, knowing you've powered through enough stuff to end the day winding down - not up.
Here's to non-proctrastination! And a big cup of proper filter coffee.
To-do
There's the official Work To-Do List.
There's the unofficial Everything Else To-Do List.
And then there's the What-if List.
A week or two back my son told me "I'm moving out". This, at age 14. He thinks his life is hard and terrible and all that stuff that afflicts teens. He has no idea... Needless to say he's still at home.
And then a day or two later he started to ask about travel. About going to see places and things, going to try out a few new experiences, look at locations we've talked about and seen on TV. This, at age 14. And most likely inspired by this amazing woman, who has done what many only dream about. A chick the kid TOTALLY respects and is in awe of.
Anyway...
We recently applied to renew his passport, as it was about to expire. That should be here in the next few weeks. He's been invited to Australia to go on a big adventure mid-year-ish by the cool chick mentioned above, and I've been pondering for ages the option of sending him off to explore the world with a backpack when he turns 16.
But at age 14, at age 15? That seems a bit young! Or am I just being a protective molly-coddling mom?
I know he's not properly equipped to handle alone-travel yet. There are things I need to teach him about. He needs to understand how the world outside the gate works, and that sometimes it's going to be very very tough. He needs survival strategies and knowledge. But he has an innate sense of adventure hiding under many many layers, a curiousity about the world. He likes to make everyone believe that he just wants to sit in his room in the dark and wait for internet access (he's still internetless - and it's got him doing other things like learning Flash!).
I know better - hey, I'm his mom! :-) I know he's shy - but he wants to get out there. I know he's scared - but he wants to experience everything, everywhere. I know - because I faced down the same stuff.
So... back to that to-do list.
Today I did a bit of trawling with regard to round-the-world tickets. Costs, stop-overs, possibilities. I'm not about to drop him off at the airport just yet, but I've started to think of world-education options. And I've got a few steps starting to take shape in my head, to prepare him for his Big Adventure Out There.
The boring to-do lists? Sometimes they need a few minutes to the side while I explore the more exciting stuff.
There's the unofficial Everything Else To-Do List.
And then there's the What-if List.
A week or two back my son told me "I'm moving out". This, at age 14. He thinks his life is hard and terrible and all that stuff that afflicts teens. He has no idea... Needless to say he's still at home.
And then a day or two later he started to ask about travel. About going to see places and things, going to try out a few new experiences, look at locations we've talked about and seen on TV. This, at age 14. And most likely inspired by this amazing woman, who has done what many only dream about. A chick the kid TOTALLY respects and is in awe of.
Anyway...
We recently applied to renew his passport, as it was about to expire. That should be here in the next few weeks. He's been invited to Australia to go on a big adventure mid-year-ish by the cool chick mentioned above, and I've been pondering for ages the option of sending him off to explore the world with a backpack when he turns 16.
But at age 14, at age 15? That seems a bit young! Or am I just being a protective molly-coddling mom?
I know he's not properly equipped to handle alone-travel yet. There are things I need to teach him about. He needs to understand how the world outside the gate works, and that sometimes it's going to be very very tough. He needs survival strategies and knowledge. But he has an innate sense of adventure hiding under many many layers, a curiousity about the world. He likes to make everyone believe that he just wants to sit in his room in the dark and wait for internet access (he's still internetless - and it's got him doing other things like learning Flash!).
I know better - hey, I'm his mom! :-) I know he's shy - but he wants to get out there. I know he's scared - but he wants to experience everything, everywhere. I know - because I faced down the same stuff.
So... back to that to-do list.
Today I did a bit of trawling with regard to round-the-world tickets. Costs, stop-overs, possibilities. I'm not about to drop him off at the airport just yet, but I've started to think of world-education options. And I've got a few steps starting to take shape in my head, to prepare him for his Big Adventure Out There.
The boring to-do lists? Sometimes they need a few minutes to the side while I explore the more exciting stuff.
Yawn
I know I said I'd do what it takes, that some things would have to fall by the wayside, and that sleep would probably be one of them. And I am willing to put in the effort required.
But I'm just.so.tired...
I've been pushing myself to the limit again on less sleep than I need. I used to function best on 8 hours straight - but those days are a distant memory and I'm having to adjust to a new schedule. Some days it works, some days I wander around like a zombie.
And some days I rely on a mid-morning caffiene kick just to keep me wired and running on static, bouncing. Today is one of them. Amazing how bouncy one can be on a liquid diet.
The thing is I'm really enjoying doing what it is that cuts into my sleep time. I wish I had a limitless reserve of energy and rest that could be tapped into at will. But working three "full-time" jobs gets even superwoman down now and then. And there are days when I simply don't have the energy to keep tabs on everything that needs it. So I simplify my tasks to bare necessities, cut the mental clutter and clatter, and simply move as quickly and effectively through what needs doing as I can.
Last night late I found myself packing cookies and brownies for today's sales. All I really wanted to do was curl up and snooze, but there I was - going to the last of my reserves so I wouldn't start this morning in a rush. And then still doing the dishes and one more task online before a shower and bed. To tired to attack the legs with a razor. Too out of it to paint my nails - or even remember I'd wanted to. Too exhausted to even summon up more than hitting doze-level on the chest of Favourite Man and merely grunting as my half of conversation!
Yes, I'm getting through everything, mostly. But I've also been hovering on the brink of falling ill for a week or two now. I know I'll have to look after Me soon and let some tasks stand over for a day or two. Just not yet. Not now. It's essential that I push out even more for a while longer.
With apologies to those who have to live and work with me.. :-)
But I'm just.so.tired...
I've been pushing myself to the limit again on less sleep than I need. I used to function best on 8 hours straight - but those days are a distant memory and I'm having to adjust to a new schedule. Some days it works, some days I wander around like a zombie.
And some days I rely on a mid-morning caffiene kick just to keep me wired and running on static, bouncing. Today is one of them. Amazing how bouncy one can be on a liquid diet.
The thing is I'm really enjoying doing what it is that cuts into my sleep time. I wish I had a limitless reserve of energy and rest that could be tapped into at will. But working three "full-time" jobs gets even superwoman down now and then. And there are days when I simply don't have the energy to keep tabs on everything that needs it. So I simplify my tasks to bare necessities, cut the mental clutter and clatter, and simply move as quickly and effectively through what needs doing as I can.
Last night late I found myself packing cookies and brownies for today's sales. All I really wanted to do was curl up and snooze, but there I was - going to the last of my reserves so I wouldn't start this morning in a rush. And then still doing the dishes and one more task online before a shower and bed. To tired to attack the legs with a razor. Too out of it to paint my nails - or even remember I'd wanted to. Too exhausted to even summon up more than hitting doze-level on the chest of Favourite Man and merely grunting as my half of conversation!
Yes, I'm getting through everything, mostly. But I've also been hovering on the brink of falling ill for a week or two now. I know I'll have to look after Me soon and let some tasks stand over for a day or two. Just not yet. Not now. It's essential that I push out even more for a while longer.
With apologies to those who have to live and work with me.. :-)
Family
A random scroll-past of something in my Google Reader this morning made me wonder what my family tree would look like if I drew it up in Visio (new to the programme, liking the options...).
And then I got to thinking that my family tree is actually pretty complicated, and getting more so. Gone are the days of an actual tree structure in modern society - families these days are more likely to have vines!
How exactly does one depict married-in and "father absent" relatives in a family tree? Steps and side-steps, halfs and semis... with extended family added on for good measure. Sjoe!
Still, family trees are interesting things. Mine includes a couple of military men, sea-faring types, and at least one illegitimate one. We may have something to do with a village, or be descended from war-like ones and mountain tribes. We might have arrived in South Africa via a valley.
Many years ago my mother spoke to the ancients in our family (my grandmothers) and got as much family history out of them as possible, drawing up our family tree as she went. I have no idea what happened to that. Or whether she was able to unravel our "vine" too far back. There are those who have their family history down pat, know its in's and out's and can give you a detailed pedigree. Ours - well... we're here. How we got here is almost lost in time - but not quite.
A few years ago I was Googling along and found a distant relative in the USA. There aren't many of either family names I arrived from, so there's a connection somewhere. We exchanged a few emails, then lost touch again. My dad's side of the family we hardly ever see, my mom's side only a fragment more frequently.
But I guess that's how it goes in this day and age. Families scatter. Families change - and that tree turns creeper.
There's a lot more rambling I could do on this one, but I'll spare you today! :-) Suffice it to say the concept of family is pretty much fascinating once you start to dig into it. The concept of hereditary characteristics that pop up a few generations later even more so...
(nope, don't panic Favourite Man - there's nothing lurking in my genes that you need to worry about! :-) )
And then I got to thinking that my family tree is actually pretty complicated, and getting more so. Gone are the days of an actual tree structure in modern society - families these days are more likely to have vines!
How exactly does one depict married-in and "father absent" relatives in a family tree? Steps and side-steps, halfs and semis... with extended family added on for good measure. Sjoe!
Still, family trees are interesting things. Mine includes a couple of military men, sea-faring types, and at least one illegitimate one. We may have something to do with a village, or be descended from war-like ones and mountain tribes. We might have arrived in South Africa via a valley.
Many years ago my mother spoke to the ancients in our family (my grandmothers) and got as much family history out of them as possible, drawing up our family tree as she went. I have no idea what happened to that. Or whether she was able to unravel our "vine" too far back. There are those who have their family history down pat, know its in's and out's and can give you a detailed pedigree. Ours - well... we're here. How we got here is almost lost in time - but not quite.
A few years ago I was Googling along and found a distant relative in the USA. There aren't many of either family names I arrived from, so there's a connection somewhere. We exchanged a few emails, then lost touch again. My dad's side of the family we hardly ever see, my mom's side only a fragment more frequently.
But I guess that's how it goes in this day and age. Families scatter. Families change - and that tree turns creeper.
There's a lot more rambling I could do on this one, but I'll spare you today! :-) Suffice it to say the concept of family is pretty much fascinating once you start to dig into it. The concept of hereditary characteristics that pop up a few generations later even more so...
(nope, don't panic Favourite Man - there's nothing lurking in my genes that you need to worry about! :-) )
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