tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59665302024-03-13T22:41:09.961+02:00...seeking serenityTHE QUEST FOR THE ZEN ZONEMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.comBlogger3026125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-3633966608880303012018-10-08T12:18:00.001+02:002018-10-08T12:18:42.179+02:00Of things lostThis is difficult to put into words... I'm not even sure I can do so properly but I'll give it a shot.
This past weekend saw a get-together of old pals from late Primary School days, around 25 years ago or more. Before we all hit High School, formed cliques, got snarky and grew apart. We physically went our different ways in life at a good point while we were still kids - and picked Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-5437937819622362802018-07-27T11:06:00.001+02:002018-07-27T11:06:42.281+02:00Limiting factorI woke up angry this morning.
Last night I had to attend a meeting to re-negotiate an important contract, as the sole lamb to slaughter representative of one side of the argument.
I failed. I am very bad at thinking on my feet, increasingly terrible at remembering vital contributing facts, and unable to fight bullies. I go in full of enthusiasm to do this right, to act like I Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-11507041433443152982018-02-20T11:35:00.002+02:002018-02-20T11:35:32.964+02:00Small TownsOn our recent roadtrip to Joburg and back, we went the "back roads". Cape Town to Calvinia, then up to Britstown where we joined the road to Kimberley - from there to Joburg, and back the same route. It was a lovely quiet road, with things to see on the way and no excessive trucks, roadworks or other kak en drama.
We passed through many small towns on the route, some were lovely, andMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-72755460490530174782018-02-15T23:12:00.001+02:002018-02-15T23:12:33.308+02:00HereditaryThought struck me this week. My mother was my age when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She died ten years later age 56.
Stress and hormonal changes approaching menopause may well have been contributing factors.
I'm living with both of these right now.
It may be time to pay better attention to my health.Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-16788166834705046372017-12-12T11:18:00.003+02:002017-12-12T11:18:24.278+02:00Grind to a halt100 years ago, inventions and innovations were in full swing. Think of all the major steps in flying, driving, technology, household goods and office machines etc that happened then - there was simply a gigantic surge in stuff being discovered, made, tweaked, and lightbulb moments.
100 years later, we seem to have ground to a halt. Every now and then someone comes up with a brilliantMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-62376568758573325662017-11-26T16:44:00.004+02:002017-11-26T16:44:42.640+02:00PerspectiveI must be getting old.
I don't see the point of Virtual Reality, when you can have Real Reality instead.
I start raising an eyebrow when the majority of the population spends all their time on their devices, oblivious to the world around them. I don't get the quest for the latest upgrade, the brag-right wars of brands, or the bigger and better (or smaller and better). I especially Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-75624074801865624812017-09-04T11:20:00.002+02:002017-09-04T11:20:24.964+02:00Age - not just a numberYou've seen them - the old folk moving their book closer and further, trying to find that focal point where they can read, and hoping it's not somewhere beyond arm's length.
This morning, that was me. Not a book, but an attempt to re-thread my sewing machine needle. And realising that it wasn't as easy today as it was a few months ago.
Quite frankly, it's scary.
But I'm starting toMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-36029214405100719782017-08-14T14:39:00.000+02:002017-08-14T14:39:12.754+02:00SelfishWhen you fly, the first thing you encounter is the Safety Speech. Exits there and there, lifejacket under the seat, oxygen mask above. And please put on your own mask before assisting other passengers.
For most of my life I've been putting on the other passenger's masks first.
I think perhaps it stems from my Christian upbringing (I'm not faulting it, merely observing). Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-43119953787251653592017-07-03T22:28:00.001+02:002017-07-03T22:28:55.290+02:00Survival instinctsI'm truly thankful for the way I grew up. I wouldn't have known half the stuff I do today if it were not for the circumstances that shaped me.
I grew up in Rhodesia during the "war years". Spent my first 12 years of life there, then we moved to South Africa. I probably experienced things many kids today in your average civilized society wouldn't. The death of my friend's Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-72639183269149170742017-05-30T22:51:00.000+02:002017-05-30T22:51:01.340+02:00MotherMany of my posts here are fluffy and insubstantial, surface stuff or random weird thoughts.
This one not so much.
When I was around 19 / 20 my mom and I had a falling out. Many do during the growing years - but ours lasted for the rest of our lives. It wasn't an all-out fight, but simply that I lost the ability to trust her and things just went downhill from there. Where some Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-45073353978645137042017-03-05T18:17:00.002+02:002017-03-05T18:17:58.804+02:00Retro adoptersRead an article today regarding the "new" Nokia 3310 release and how products are appealing to Retro Adopters. Got me thinking... am I one?
I'm now (horrifyingly) in my mid-to-late 40's. I grew up in an era where things were still made to last, tech was not common - your telephone was attached to a point in the house and had a dial, microwaves were basically unknown, not Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-59739574167825547222017-02-28T20:46:00.001+02:002017-02-28T20:46:13.453+02:00How to AdultThe last day of this summer is drawing to a close - darkness has fallen on the month of February and it's not even 8pm yet. Winter is coming...
And why am I prefacing a post on Adulting with that? Well because this.
When you Adult, you don't feel obliged to be all bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready for a jol until the early hours, when 8pm strikes. You don't feel under Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-12784820893087623512017-02-19T23:02:00.002+02:002017-02-19T23:02:41.181+02:00SummertimeI've just realized that it's the last month of summer, and my legs have not seen the sun YET AGAIN this year. That makes around 5 years of lily-white I think - and no, I'm not posting pics, or I'd blind the lot of you.
I spend my working life in jeans, and as work is about all I do, I have a lovely "farmer's tan" on my arms and other exposed bits, while the legs literally glow in the dark.Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-90212008653312118742017-01-17T12:55:00.001+02:002017-01-17T12:55:23.907+02:00WordsI could write books with what goes on in my head every day. Except when it comes time to put it into words, or write it down in a way that anyone would want to read - I have no words.
The habit of keeping quiet is spreading to my ability to write.... Either that or age is already beginning to impact my brain.Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-17050672681055262592016-11-30T13:20:00.002+02:002016-11-30T13:20:34.827+02:00What could beYou know those days where your entire being rebells against the to-do list, the mindless tasks, the endless sideshows, the constant sukkel with people that goes on and on when you have to keep a business going?
Yup, today's another one of those.
Some people would say "my kop raas". But it's not noise in the head, it's all that stuff I could be doing, would rather be doing.
The older I Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-31427459801961068752016-05-18T11:03:00.002+02:002016-05-18T11:03:48.613+02:00How to kill yourselfI don't often say a whole lot (anymore), but it doesn't mean that I'm not absorbing info and forming opinions. And there's a whole lot of info plus daily experiences that are culminating in some very hard truths.
Just one example: at age 44, I am suffering with relatively bad arthritis in my hands - making daily jobs (and even typing this post) difficult, painful and just a little bit Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-66432533100896055892016-04-29T13:50:00.002+02:002016-04-29T13:50:29.776+02:00MissingI've misplaced my core of contentment.
I need to get it back....Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-61749243439465726942016-03-07T14:00:00.000+02:002016-03-07T14:00:06.982+02:00Creative outletI am not the world's best artist. That is a fact.
I'm not the world's best writer. Fact again.
Nor musician.
Nor gardener.
Nor chef.
Nor photographer
Nor woodworker.
Nor decorator / home maker.
But that doesn't mean I can't do my own version of all of the above - and more.
For the past few years, as we've been building a company or two, time has been in short supply. Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-62587621683707757422015-07-17T13:50:00.002+02:002015-07-17T13:50:50.505+02:00SuccessWhat, exactly is success?
I'm 40-something. Should I count success as (at this age) owning property, driving a snazzy paid-off car, never counting cents at the Pick 'n Pay tills, and being able to take holidays overseas?
If so, I'm definitely not successful! Although I work myself ragged every day, most days it still feels like I'm treading water, struggling to survive, getting Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-45231332547310274152015-07-05T21:13:00.000+02:002015-07-05T21:13:00.715+02:00Photoblog - Winter morningsMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-80065554069228121642015-03-25T12:13:00.000+02:002015-03-25T12:13:17.777+02:00RetirementI am really looking forward to retirement. But not perhaps for the reasons you may imagine.
Since I went the self-employed route, every day has been basically a mad rush. On duty 24x7, one gets completely bound up by work, work-related thoughts, work tasks, and circling that single theme. Weekdays, week nights and weekends - it's all the same.
There really is no time or space Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-11863259758889652892015-02-06T10:12:00.001+02:002015-02-06T10:12:23.401+02:00LoadsheddingIn South Africa we've moved on from talking about the weather, to talking about loadshedding... If there's nothing else to complain about, this will quickly become the go-to topic across social media!
But this is Africa. We're adaptable, and we've been working around self-centered inept governance for generations.
So don't panic! It's only electricity!
What we're getting veryMichellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-11737121786225537632015-01-26T12:41:00.001+02:002015-01-26T12:41:22.968+02:00TimeThe trouble with having a minute or two of peace in which to actually form thoughts, is that you actually form thoughts....
Even worse, in my case, you not only form thoughts, but you start solving the world's problems - and then move on to all sorts of interesting, creative, awesome and fun things to do, try, make - and then move on to places to go, things to see,...
It all just kinda Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-12561455158840305632015-01-18T23:07:00.000+02:002015-01-18T23:07:03.097+02:00On not giving a flying...For the past few months I have had a "lump in the throat" feeling. Antibiotics have been applied by a pharmacist for assumative-diagnosis "severe sinusitis", with no result. Some days it's bad enough that I can barely swallow and have trouble
breathing, accompanied by soreness and all sorts of other kak. It comes and goes though, and I've reached the conclusion it's stress Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5966530.post-37109400681572348542014-12-30T22:55:00.003+02:002014-12-30T22:55:59.314+02:00This Old HouseAnd thus it was we moved. Rather suddenly, before our lease was officially up at the old place, but in time - as the new owner was getting itchy feet to start his renovations. It was time to go.
I found our new place quite by accident. I had my tablet with me one Saturday night in front of the telly, happened to open Gumtree, happened to check what was available, and found Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09669869159446275381noreply@blogger.com0