I'm not making any New Year's resolutions this year. Instead, I'm taking time after my recent birthday to sit down and think about where I am, and where I wish I were, and how I can positively change the many, many things I'm unhappy with.

For my birthday, one brother gave me the little book "Who moved my cheese?" - I read it through in the time it took for a load of washing to wash. It has reinforced much of what I already know and believe, but I know it was also given as a push in the right direction to get my business up and going, and to get past the fear of a potentially very big change. One of the Big Questions the book asks is "what would you do if you weren't afraid?" - something to ponder very seriously.

I'll officially be on holiday from later on this week until the new year, and plan to take a few hours to sit and think. Usually I just get a train of thought going, and have to give it up to do something or be somewhere or attend to a kid's need. But I'll banish him to his friend, or to the house we're house-sitting (complete with a huge collection of DVD's and satellite TV...) so I can be still and think.

There's a lot to think through. My self-image, my health and body issues, my spiritual life, where I belong in this world and what I need to be doing, parenting stuff, thinking through what I really want out of life - my goals and ambitions, my hopes and dreams - and how I can be/do/achieve it.

It's a lot to think about, and it's not something you can do in scattered minutes throughout the day. You need time to let the train of thought reach its destination without being derailed, and perhaps a pen and paper to help find the path.

Somehow, it just seems right to do this now, instead of over the new year period. It almost feels like life has reached a cross-roads, or a bend in the journey, and that I need to tread carefully to find the right path.

So that's what I'll be doing. That's what happened after the birthday came and went. And yes, you're more than likely to hear what I'm thinking about right here in my little space on the net! :)