Fear

I sometimes find myself paralyzed with fear - not the "scared of the dark" variety, but fear that I'm wrong.

Am I headed in the wrong direction in life? Can I really survive out there on my own as a self-employed person? Am I doing the right thing when I dream big, or am I in reality doomed to plod a mundane path, never fulfilling my ambitions? On some days the thought "What the hell am I doing?!" runs through my head on endless-repeat.

It's not only the self-employment thing, it's also my dreams of travel and adventure. I fear that I'm just creating a disaster by drooling over 4x4's and endless horizons. What, in reality, do I know about such things? The amount I have to learn still is sufficiently daunting to terrify me!

But I've found a cure for fear. It's Inspiration.

When I fear I cannot be self-employed, I read up on those who have made a success of it. Those who have found a way to fulfill their dreams - with hard work, creativity and a willingness to give it a go, come what may.

When I fear the inside workings of a Landy and my lack of knowledge thereof, I read up on those who were once were I am, but who have gone on to do most excellent things and have awesome adventures.

I look to support communities too - clubs for the 4x4 folk, groups of go-it-alone workers, and even the odd-man-out type church. :)

I find if I muddle along in self-pity, my fear grows to insane proportions, crippling me and holding me back from the path I want to follow. I know that if I take a deep breath, push past the fear and just do it - the rewards are going to be amazing. Focus on the goal - fear is merely a stepping stone, the adrenaline rush that propels me along the path my heart has worn.