Surviving the Teen Years

I hope my son survives the teen years. Not because of any teen angst or raging hormones. Oh no - I hope he survives me!

He's been going out of his way to irritate the heck out of me lately. He discovered long ago that I hate the whiney voice that moans and begs - so now he uses it constantly, no matter what he's saying. And he doesn't say that much. But more and more what he does say is also irritating me - it's one moany whine after another, nothing serious, but just the kind of thing that makes me want to grind my teeth or move out.

Tonight he was going on about something I had no control over, just because he could - a video disk didn't want to play on either of our computers, so he upped the "why" factor in his nasal tone and kept at it until I was ready to shout at him, adding in moans over supper and why it wasn't ready yet (when he chose to have breakfast at lunchtime and then not have lunch at all). I didn't shout at him - but I was so close.

I think I've bred a monster too... It's been easier for me to simply do stuff than to goad and prod him into helping - so I've ended up doing everything. He has basically no chores (my bad), expects meals and stuff to just come to him, and spends his entire day sitting on his butt ordering things. OK - to be fair, he does get helpful now and then, but not that often. I've tried to bribe him with an allowance increase, I've left things to fester (literally - like his toy piles and shoes in the corner), I've asked nicely, I've asked not so nicely. Sometimes things get done, sometimes they simply don't. And I end up p'd off. (On a side note, our neighbour and IT guy mentioned that if he cleaned the space next to the computer, he'd have more room for gaming stuff - it was done within minutes! I have a good mind to give our IT guy a list of other things I want done... :-) )

Unfortunately for all involved we're merely starting out with this whole teen thing. He's just turned 13 6 months ago and we have a loooonnng road ahead still. These are still mini-tremors, the big one/s are on their way.

Tonight I'm wondering how I'm going to cope. I've had it quite easy up to now - no messy divorce or custody battles, no real hassles with him, nothing. We've had a good understanding and gotten along more as equals than parent/son. Now he's testing his boundaries, and I hope he doesn't flatten me in the process.

Or me him...