Sorting out Everything

I'm too late for Spring Cleaning and too early for New Year's Resolutions, but recently I've been in "redo the nest" mode - and that's pretty timeless.

This year has been a mad rush from one thing to another, hours spent working hard with not enough attention paid to my environment. But I honestly cannot function well in disorganized, cluttered and dusty surroundings - I get irritable and snappy, stressed out and simply clam up.

And that's exactly what's happened recently. In an attempt to split my waking hours between a million and one things, I haven't been attending to the very basic stuff that keeps me calmly on course. I'm an organization freak - I like to have everything where it belongs, sorted and tidy, but that's not showing lately at all.

However it can only continue for so long. Two weeks ago I started to get extremely angsty, felt like I was losing myself. Last week I spent ages on a number of websites reminding myself of what home should and could be, plotting, planning and making lists of things to accomplish once I no longer spend daylight hours in an office far away from home. I've thought through my work-from-home environment and requirements, looked at every corner and cupboard and wall with detached scrutiny, determined what needs to go and what needs to be acquired. From ceiling space in the roof to potential veg garden outside, and everything in between. I've sat in silence (when I can find it), going deep inside to discover what gives me courage and strength, and how to incorporate that into how/where I live.

This weekend in a small way I started to implement all those - starting with organizing a single cupboard's two shelves and a box of stuff in the kitchen. It may not look any different to the casual observer, but it's merely the beginning. My list is long, my resolve strong, my priorities over the next few weeks lined up - and I know that if I don't sort out what I need to sort out, I will not make a success of my plans for the year ahead. If I don't have control over my environment, I'm not going to have the self-confidence and surety I need to take on the world. I'm not going to be able to stand up to challenges or know that I have a safe and calm haven to recuperate in at day's end.

Three days left at work, full-time employed and commuting. Three days left of my time being bought and paid for by others. Once these three days are up, things are going to change in a big way - time to turn house into home once and for all and get home-base life sorted before I move on to becoming and doing what every fibre of my being knows it will be.


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