Updating the Sex Ed

It's funny how my worldview has shifted over the past few years. Things I thought were set in stone, suddenly aren't. Religion & spirituality has changed, my headspace is completely different.

And that's spread to the sex education side of parenting too.

Now some of you are likely to crucify me (or at least delete this blog from your blogroll and turn your eyes heavenward in horror), but I don't plan on preaching to my son that sex before marriage is completely wrong. I'm not going to put guilt and pressure on him, when I know full-well that times have more than changed, and that kids his age may already be experimenting with sex.

Instead, I'm looking at a more "liberated" view of sex, and how I'll deal with his sexuality.

Yes, he knows all about AIDS and STDs from school, but I will also talk to him about the emotional aspects of getting involved in sex at too young an age, how you can only give your virginity to one person - and that it's worth it to rather wait than be sorry later.

He knows about condoms. He knows about other means of birth control. I will, if necessary, help him buy them (later...). (He's not getting into my stash! :) )

I plan to teach him everything there is to know about the female body, so that he will understand fully what is appropriate and what is not once he acquires a girlfriend. (And should he choose to instead acquire a boyfriend - amazingly, I'm OK with that. No one is going to go crazy should his sexual orientation turn out different from the "norm") I plan to share my experience of sex and how it can both be good and bad, harmful and wonderful. I aim to equip him with knowledge, and more knowledge, so that he can not only make an informed decision regarding his sexuality, but not feel under pressure to either hold out indefinitely or feel guilty for not doing so.

Am I weird? Probably. Going to hell? Perhaps..! :)

But kids are doing this earlier rather than later (watch "Thirteen", if you haven't already), and he's about to hit teenagedom.

Last night we watched "The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human" - a pretty good starting point for discussion, and a humorous bit of sex ed if ever I saw one. We've seen the opposite end of the spectrum - an American woman who gave very indepth info on just what you can contract from sex (30 different STDs and more), which was kinda scary, but realistic. I don't restrict his viewing if there's sexual content on TV/movies, but we do talk about it before and after we've seen it.

I guess I'm part of the new, liberated parenting movement! :) But I suspect that going about it this way may help him in the long run, not harm him.

As always, your thoughts in the comments are welcome!