2 months

Maximum. Less if I can manage it. That's how long I'm giving myself before I implement some pretty heavy plans, permanently.

It's not going to be at all easy. It's probably going to be more difficult than anything I've done yet - and it's going to require me going against some good, common sense, generally-accepted ways of doing things that have been subconsciously holding me back.

Yes, I'm scared. What if I can't pull this off? What if I get it so wrong that it makes things a whole lot worse? Can I stand up for myself sufficiently to simply say no to things that don't feed in to my goal, that eat away at my time and energy, that someone else could and should be doing? Can I ask for help when I need it? Can I change course smoothly if one plan appears to be failing, without getting bogged down in paralyzing self-pity? Can I be "cut-throat" against the competition?

But the promise of what can be - what should be and MUST be - is foremost in my head. Step by step I'm plotting the path to get there and calculating what I'm willing to give up, let go of, or do to reach it.

I know it's going to take a LOT. More effort than I've ever put forth before. More focus, more single-minded thought and attention turned in one direction than I've ever had to come up with. It's going to take very careful organization, allocation of hours in day and prioritization. I'm going to be dumping non-essential time-wasters in a big way (GReader items being culled as this goes live). There's pressure from other essential projects that will come into play - and I need to find a place for each, with equal importance.

Yet it's also exciting, the possibilities truly endless, and I face the way forward with both butterflies and anticipation. Having made the decision, every hour of the day has already shifted in focus. I'm mentally detached from that which I know isn't going to feed my goal - while my brainspace is turned toward that which will.

Two months. It's not a lot of time to move from one place to another in life successfully. But a single incident today has pissed me off sufficiently to push this to the point of no return, added startling clarity to the road before me.

Now it's full steam ahead. Come what may.