Hopeless!

I've just dashed down to our mall to get the weekly goodies that keep body and soul together, but one small incident while there made me realize a horrible thing!

It happened like this: I popped into Wordsworth Books to check if they had something I want, and behind the "maps and travel" case I had to step over a bloke sitting cross-legged on the floor, surrounded by various maps of South Africa. On the way back I nearly stepped over him again, but in a snap decision stopped and asked, "Going anywhere interesting?". "Yup", says he, "just trying to find out where!" I pointed at the rack behind us filled with international guide books and told him, "It's not like you don't have a choice!" - but he reckoned he wanted to start small, with stuff in the area.

At which point I was already flustered and blushing thanks to being bold enough to talk to a stranger - and not even one I was "trying to pick up"!!! So I kinda threw in one more comment and buggered off...! Face probably still aglow.

Which made me realize that as much as I put on a show of bravado every day, I'm still really really shy. And too shy to pick up guys, for sure! I mean, this was just a few phrases exchanged with some bloke who looked like your average done-working-for-the-week business type, though I'm not sure I've ever seen a businessman type sitting crosslegged on the carpet in a shop. More like an "computer geek during the week, 4x4 on weekends" type of guy. And although I definitely wasn't doing any picking up, I thought afterwards I should have stuck him for a coffee and discussed where to go in the area (never hurts to meet new people!).

So that's my big mall lightbulb moment. I'm hopeless at picking up guys (I may be equally hopeless at being picked up! :-) ). I'm even hopeless at simply chatting to strangers. I'm too shy. I blush too easily. I get all flustered and stick foot firmly in mouth. I only think of the right thing to say when it's too late.

Like I said, hopeless.